The Journey

The Lenten Kickoff

2012-02-22T09:34:00.002-05:00

I hate that it's been so long since I've even logged on to my blog...hey, that rhymed...anyway...

Today, Ash Wednesday is the start of Lent. Before we go much further into that, let me just make sure we're all on the same 'page' here (my page, yep, we're all here!!)

I'm an inwardly spiritual person. I pray, a lot....more these days, considering there are struggles in my life. Right, wrong or indifferent, it's my blog, I'm being honest. I pray more when I have a fear or an issue. That's not the point of all this, just don't judge it! So, where were we? Ahhh, yes, inwardly spiritual. I spent a lot, I mean a lot of years in church, leading youth groups, helping make an impact in society by making sure kids were being led and such. I worshiped, every week and then I stopped. I didn't stop believing, I stopped attending and sometimes I wonder why. Quite honestly, though, I could stand in my garage, every Sunday for a zillion years and that won't make me a car anymore than sitting in church every week makes me any more of a Christian. So, if you're shocked I'm "kicking off" Lent with a blog post, consider all of that and let me have my say...

Why today? Well, it IS the first day of Lent and while a lot of people make resolutions on New Years, I am choosing today as my resolution day. I need something to focus on. I'm currently unemployed and while I don't stay 'down long' and many of you remind me how I always 'bounce back from adversity' (trust those who know me, while often not job related, I've had my share of crap)...I'm not happy with the state of some things in my life.

So, here I go again, on whatever round this is of "Getting back on track" and I find Lent the greatest way to kick this off for me.

Last night I posted on Facebook that I was giving up carbs for Lent. I need to clarify...I'm going back on my program, the one that works for me when I focus and pay attention to it. Giving up carbs wasn't totally correct, but if you read far enough back in this blog you'll see what it's all about, it's one of the very first posts, and I don't know how to re-post the link here....I tried and tried...HELP! I see people do that all the time and I'm clueless :-( (It's post # 2, December 2008 if you're so inclined)

Giving up carbs was an inaccurate statement. Going back on the program is much more accurate and that does include limited "good for you" carbs...so there's some clarification.

So, off I go...it's time to start this show, once again...and this year, a week earlier than last year! The goal: STAY on plan until vacation or until goal. Whichever comes first and the long-term goal....MAINTAIN it this time, better than last or even better than the last before that! UGH!

Oh, one more goal, I need to find a job. I'm intrigued by some of the possibilities out there, but need to find the faith in myself to take the leap! I'll keep you all posted, because, this is a great release for me, even if nobody reads it but Todd and my mom! <3

And...we're...off...

A Failed Perfectionist....

2011-12-13T14:30:00.002-05:00

On what was a long drive this week, I spent some time listening to my first audiobook. The book I chose was Katie Couric's 'The Best Advice I Ever Got' and there were several parts of that book that resonated with me. Here is the link if anyone is interested in learning more about the book: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/02/24/arts/television/24couric.html

To me, it spoke of goals, ambitions, successes & failures, joy and sadness and so many other things.

So what does that book have to do with the title of this blog, or the subject matter of this blog, you might ask? Well, one of the contributors described herself as a failed perfectionist in her segment of the book and that is one of the things that truly hit home with me when I heard it. Today, once again, I am just that.

I am a failed perfectionist. As much as I want everything in my life to be perfect and my 'control factor' allow me to have it that way, it just isn't. I'm not sure there is anything, yes, ANYTHING that is perfect in my life. The one big thing that isn't perfect is my success along this journey through this blog. Once again, I find myself (sooner rather than later) writing to you all (if anyone is even still reading this) and admitting that I need to restart my lifestyle program.

I am not perfect, even when I am at goal I am not perfect. My "full" button is broke! That button most people have that says to them, hey, quit eating, you're full....ya know, the button....mine is either missing or broke! I'm flat out broken! I realize this as days go by and I seem to find that I always have room for food, good food, bad food, anything...I always have room, cuz my ding-dang button is broke and I hate that. I give in to the broken button and I really hate that! I wish I knew what to do to fix my button! I don't want to live the rest of my days with a broken button!

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind being a failed perfectionist at some things, I mean nobody is perfect! My house will never be clean enough, my job perfect enough, my relationships without drama, but if that were the case, it would make my Facebook page quite boring! I do, however, wish I had better control over the choices I make where my health and weight come in to play. I have done it before but I have relied on the medication and that temporarily fixes my button, but I would like to find a way to control all of that post-meds.

So, I'm human, not perfect and struggling really badly right now. I'm very unhappy with me these days which makes me feel like I make everyone around me unhappy and that certainly isn't fair to the people I love. It is a struggle for me and especially during the holiday season. I try to cover over my funk, but I'm not sure how good I'm doing at that either!

So today has so far been a better day, I've stayed on plan, without meds no taking things almost hour by hour....there are people out there who never have to worry about this topic and man, I wish I was one of them! Alas, I'm not and I know it's a day by day struggle.

I hope all of you still involved in your journey are more successful than I have been in the last few months! I sure hope to be writing to you next time under a little more control!

Merry Christmas!

One more thing

2011-11-21T21:02:00.001-05:00

Two posts in one day!

So, thanks...to all of you who read this, who live this journey with me, day in and day out. Whether you want to be or not, you're in this with me and I appreciate all of your support, your comments and your dedication to keep coming back and reading all this!

A question for you...what do you do to overcome your biggest obstacles??

It's been a long time..and I can tell

2011-11-21T19:39:00.001-05:00

I have to tell you, there is a part of doing this blog that keeps me "honest", especially to myself.

Tonight I write to you, feeling a little down in the dumps because I had a bad couple of months and have let it linger to no fault of anyone but myself and here I find myself at the holidays, disgusted because I gained outside of my "comfort zone" and while not needing to officially "restart" I need to get my ass back on track. Sorry for that, but it is what it is.

When I lost my job this summer, I joined myself in a pity party. I was stressed and down and unfortunately I'm one of those down in the dumps people who turns to food. "Lucky" for Todd, my better half, that he doesn't. I wish I was strong enough to turn another way when I get to feeling like that.

I hate the fact that I turn to food to find comfort, it's stupid but it is something that I have to make a conscious decision about every day. I haven't been doing that and it's time I remember that this is something that needs to be in the forefront of my mind each and every day. I wish it didn't have to be, but sometimes people have things they just have to learn to deal with, like diabetes or alcoholism or something that forces you to control what you do for a reason.

I don't have "all that much" to get back to where I want to be. I mean, I've started this journey and restarted this journey at much heavier than today, but today THIS is no longer acceptable to me.

I canceled my gym membership, but tomorrow I'll be restarting somewhere else. I had canceled because I was having a hard time finding time to fit that into my new and busier schedule, but I know now that I need to make the time to do the things that work for me. If that means being at the gym at 5:00 a.m., that's what I'm going to do. It's just that simple.

SO here I am, three days before Thanksgiving, my favorite day of the year, and looking forward to making the right choices from here on out.

Wish me luck...once again!

Jobless & Stressed

2011-08-08T17:54:00.000-04:00

What a way to start really getting into maintenance. It's been a couple of weeks since I've blogged, but the title of this post pretty much sums it up.

After my last blog post, Todd, Elise & I took a road-trip to Wisconsin. Yes, three of us, in a car for 2850 miles, for a week! Actually, we had a blast. We broke the trip up on the way up there, stopped in Atlanta, spent the night and went to the Aquarium, went to Chicago and did a lot of sight-seeing. We were able to spend some time with Todd's family and just really get away from things. It was nice.

However, I came home and went back to work, only to be let go from my position. As a lot of you know, there was a tremendous amount of stress working with the new management changes since February and apparently everything had tested it's limits to the breaking point. I was let go on 7/27 after 5 1/2 years there. That's all I'm going to say about that.

However, it's been incredibly stressful here considering neither of us are working, the economy totally bites and jobs are those things that require transportation. I had a company car, so I am transportation-less now as well. It's difficult to go out and buy a car when you have no income, so we're relying on Todd's car as our one vehicle at this point.

I'm sure glad the decision for he and Elise to move in here was made prior to my current employment status, otherwise I'd be a little concerned he just felt sorry for me! LOL

Needless to say, when I'm frustrated or stressed or upset...I don't care so much about what I eat. The past couple of weeks haven't been overly horrible, nor have they been overly successful. I'm still watching what I do, but by no means have I done what I need to every day. I'm definitely meal by meal, snack by snack at this point. On top of that, my gym schedule is all screwed up...ARGH!

I need a normal routine! Starting tomorrow, it's got to happen, at least the food and water....I'm promising myself that is going to start!! In the interim, I continue to job search...not a fun thing to do!

I just need to remember, choices & consequences....every day brings another choice and another consequence. Once this week is over, with moving things from the apartment to the house, Elise being away for a week, etc...things will start to settle into a more normal routine. I'm looking forward to "normal"...I'm not sure what that is or if I'll know when I find it...but I'm looking forward to it, none the less!

I hope all of you are hanging on better than I am!

~Michelle

Maintaining on Maintenance

2011-07-09T15:23:00.000-04:00

Hello! It's been a while since I've blogged but honestly, there hasn't been a whole lot to tell these days.

I have officially started maintenance and no more meds (still injections for energy every week right now, but not taking anything else). Things are going well. Although I am at the point where I can add in "starch" and other things, mentally I'm not there yet. I still pretty much follow the same food program, but I will add other things here and there. I'd say about 90% of what I eat is still right from the original plan.

Some of the things I learned at my maintenance transition appointment I found rather interesting. One of them was about drinking the water. It was told to me that if you take your weight and divide by 2, that's how many ounces of water you should drink in a day. Okay, luckily, that's less than a gallon, so it's been a little easier to handle that! :-)

Also, when we discussed adding starches and all, we discussed potatoes. It makes sense, but never really dawned on me before. Lori advised that if I choose to eat potatoes, I should boil them first. Boiling them removes a lot of the starch (think about the inside of the pan after you boil a potato)...therefore helping reduce the amount of carbs you consume in eating that potato! Makes perfect sense, NOW!

I did also learn that I'm definitely not eating enough or often enough. I need to focus more on eating breakfast. I hate breakfast...it's annoying! I don't get up early enough to eat breakfast, really. I did eat breakfast during the losing part of the program, but it's easy for me to get out of the habit of doing so. I don't do a great job of snacking either. I am, however, getting better at that. It's easier to snack in the summer with all of the fresh fruits and vegetables I buy. So many great choices during the summer months.

One of the pages in the Zone Wellness packet I received that discusses maintenance, mentions this..."Simply fill your plate with a combination of vegetables and fruits. Use breads, grains and starches as condiments." That's pretty much what I've been doing. I made a shrimp pasta dish last night for Todd and I...I ate mostly shrimp and maybe three fork fulls of pasta. It really was just enough of it for me.

Another page indicates the combination for a zone-perfect balanced meal: 1/3 low fat protein, 2/3 vegetables & fruits and a 'dash' of good fat. What is a "good fat" you ask? Keep reading!

Let's talk about fats for a minute...there are some "good fats" that you should incorporate into your diet. There are also some things you should avoid and things you should definitely limit. I've listed them for you below:

Good Fats: Omega 3 oils, foods such as Salmon, Tuna, Sardines, Flax Seed and things with Omega 9 oils such as Olive Oil, Canola Oil, Avocado (yum), Almonds, Cashews & Macadamia Nuts.

Bad Fats: Limit these: Saturated fats, Animal fats/Dairy, Corn Oil, Safflower Oil
Avoid these: Trans fatty acids (found in processed foods!), margarine, fried foods, shortening.

The last of the "rules" for staying in the Zone Wellness was the best one. If you make a mistake, don't worry. No guilt, just get back in the zone with your next meal.

I certainly don't claim to have all the right things to do or say, but I can tell you all that I'm still giving 100% to maintaining the work I put into getting back to where I wanted to be. I'm thrilled to be at goal, and working toward some toning and ultimately living a healthier lifestyle. Is that to say I'm never going to eat another bad thing? No, but I'm not going to freak out when I don't have a choice somewhere, I'm going to make the best choice when given options that are different than what I would do at home, and return to my normal routine as quickly as I can. It's pretty simple in my mind...now to just do it!

Next time, I'll update you on the rest of the Zone Wellness information that I have!

Week 15...And so, it starts...

2011-06-13T22:26:00.000-04:00

My apologies! It's been a long and busy couple of weeks and there hasn't been all that much to post here in regards to the day to day life on the program.

Things are going so well at this point in the program. Today marks 15 weeks and things have gone great. As of today I've lost 42.6 pounds and even though I'm not quite to where I want to be, I've officially started the transition to maintenance. What does that mean, you ask? Well, this is my last week of medicine. I was taking 3 doses a day of the appetite suppressant and today we cut that down to 1 dose a day for a week, then no more appetite suppressant. I've not really taken that regularly for the last couple of weeks, so I feel confident that I can still make the right choices even without it. I confirmed with Dr. Armstrong today, it's nothing more than to control hunger and I don't feel like that's an issue for me now. Just imagine it definitely wouldn't if I were truly drinking the entire gallon of liquid a day! :-)

The transition to maintenance, while I am certain I am ready, is freaking me out a little bit. As most of you know, this isn't the first time I've done this but I am greatly convinced it's different this time and that I can do it. Funny, there was just a Facebook post on the Garcia Weight Loss page that asked what the most difficult to avoid thing is during maintenance. My post back was something to the effect of thinking that the first time I just was going to "know" what to do and it would just take that to maintain. This time, I KNOW that it takes daily conscious effort to make the right decisions. Unfortunately, I've come to realize that this is something I am going to have to live with every day of life.

This week I have challenged myself to at least double the water I have been drinking lately, it hasn't been enough! I'm technically 5.6 pounds from where I thought I wanted goal to be. I think we are close enough to start the transition while 100% remaining on the program. I am determined to be done with the medication before the 23rd of June. I'm not sure I'm ready to blog about why yet, but you never know when a post might shown up here. :-)

I can't begin to tell you how much happier of a person I am now. I feel confident and fun and a little sexy even, sometimes. Although I'm pretty sure my boyfriend just chuckled at that comment! Haha! I think feeling like this is totally worth having to make conscious decisions about staying this way. This time, I'm not willing to give that feeling up!

So, maintenance begins...although at this point, the only change is coming off of meds. Next week, I'll be sure to fill you in on what happens during maintenance...I have to save something for you to read next time! Just know that servings change, food choices are expanded and there's a little different weigh in/visit schedule.

Have a fantastic week....I'm very much looking forward to mine!!

Week 13...Back On Track

2011-05-31T16:26:00.000-04:00

I hope you all had a wonderful Memorial Day weekend! A holiday weekend, the kick-off to summer and what a great weekend I had!

The past week was definitely a little hectic. Work has been crazy busy and I've been driving around all over the place in my territory to visit with agents. That part of my job definitely takes some prior planning as far as staying on the program is concerned! It is difficult to drive to the outlying places I've been and drink a gallon of water during the day! Meal planning is the easier part, but it definitely takes "planning".

This week on my long days on the road I was able to plan my meals, pack a cooler bag and have become a fan of some of the local parks in and around the areas where my sales calls were located. It's great to just sit in the park, eat lunch, maybe make a phone call or two and just have some quiet time for a short break. That being said, there are also those days when I'm driving down the road and eating between calls because there just wasn't time to stop! Ahhh, life as a sales & marketing person and being on the road!

I suppose all of the planning and preparations for a busy week paid off, though. This week was an excellent week at weigh in. I weighed in today with a loss of 6.6 pounds and am 9 pounds away from goal! I can't believe in a quarter of a year, I've come within 10 pounds of goal with a total of 39 pounds lost. I know that the commitment to maintain is there without question. It's been very rare that I've even wanted anything that wasn't on the program. It's just easy to follow when you commit to following!

I'm hoping to start maintenance in the next couple weeks, a decrease of the meds, adding in other things, all great stuff...as always, I'll keep you posted!

Have a fabulous week!

Week 12--Where do we go from here?

2011-05-24T21:22:00.000-04:00

Gosh, it's been a couple of weeks since I've posted a blog update for you all. It's been absolutely crazy, dealing with some issues at work and traveling for work and now my grandmother needing some prayers that she will recover nicely from a fall resulting in a broken hip and lots of rehab time to come. She's 92...and up until last week was planning a move to my parents house, just to be near where she spends most of her time. Here's to hoping this is just a minor set-back for her!

Well, it's been an interesting couple of weeks in so many ways. Life sometimes just gets overwhelmingly busy. I can't remember the last time I just had a quiet day or night to do "nothing" or whatever I want! I do have a vacation day on Friday and I think I'm looking forward to just getting things done that I want to do! I think when you work over a weekend it throws off all of the "things" that you plan to do, even if you don't actually "do" them! That makes sense in my head...but I'm not positive it did there! :-)

So, the reason you all read this blog is not to really see what I am stressing about or what things keep me from doing laundry or watering plants (dang it, forgot again!) or all of those things, but how the journey is progressing.

We left off on Week 9 with a total loss of 31.4 pounds and an update on losing inches and reflecting on the important things. Gosh, maybe I should read my blog once in a while!!

Well, Week 10 from what I remember, was a lot of work stress, more than I would ever even care to think about during the time when I am not working, so I'll spare you the boring details. However, the weigh in did produce a "no loss/no gain"...and a total of 31.4 pounds lost...frustrating, but completely deserved, considering the weekend that was just prior to weigh in was one with visiting work people and lots of "entertaining"! Yes, entertaining is what we'll call that. Granted, I don't deviate from the food plan, but I think someone turned my water into Vodka once or twice. Conscious decisions, I'm just going to keep repeating that to myself!

Week 11 was a much more "normal" week, if you can define "normal" these days. Work, a beach visit, just a regular week in Florida. Week 11 produced a 3.2 pound loss! Whatever I did that week, I'd like to put on "Replay" for a few more weeks!!

So now we make it to Week 12 and while I could tell you that I traveled for work for a good portion of the week and I could only control a portion of what I ate, and that I weighed in on Monday in the afternoon, rather than in the morning, and that I ate breakfast AND lunch before my weigh in...I'm not going to focus on that. The part that is the focus this week is that for the first time in the "history" of being on program with Garcia, I posted a GAIN. Granted, there was that time when I was "off" the program, I gained more than I care to admit then, but, that's a blog post from the past! OUCH! Yes, 2.2 pounds of "life got in the way" is now sitting right on my....well, I'm not exactly sure, but it's there!

When I check out of Dr. Garcia's office, the girls in there know me well, some of them are on my Facebook, some of them see me every week, same time, same place! We had a great conversation yesterday regarding my annoyance (that's the nice word) over the gain. The things listed above are true, I did only have control over a portion of what I ate last week, I did weigh in after my normal time, and after two meals but the fact of the matter is I had a gain. While there are factors that presented themselves, ultimately, I gained. So, there you have it...I'm completely human now! The conversation with the office yesterday was great though. The topic was not about the gain, but about the choices and decisions you make from this point on. I have options. I could decide to be annoyed about a 2.2 pound gain and let it become a factor in two ways. I could decide that I'm over it and just forget about reaching my goal, which is now 15.6 pounds away (and I have a time frame in mind for something to happen when I hit goal) OR I could decide that I'm over it and that's the last time I'll post a gain or give up the lack of control over what circumstances are placed in front of me.

I'm thinking you all have a pretty clear understanding of what direction I chose to go. I'm full force back on program, drinking every drop of water, taking meds on time and tonight, finished my 2nd workout of the week. There's no question, even with a holiday weekend coming up that on Tuesday night, I'll be posting a blog showing a loss. I just hope it's more than the 2.2 pounds! :-)

I suppose we could label this a little setback. Seems I have had a few of those lately in lots of aspects of my life. For the most part, all but one of those setbacks have been overcome. I see no reason why returning to my "I am going to do this and nobody is going to stop me" mindset can't just stick around at this point.

Ultimately, I have something I am so looking forward to doing, but I have to have hit goal and be off the Phendimetrazine for a period of time first....so there's a mission! Not that there hasn't been a mission all along, but now it's more of a time sensitive one ;-) That's all I'm sharing about that for now. Maybe some more another day...maybe not!

I hope you all have a safe and happy Memorial Day weekend! Can you believe it's summer already??? (Well, for those of us in Florida, it's been summer for weeks!) HeeHee :)

Reflections & Inches-Week 9 Round 2

2011-05-02T19:50:00.000-04:00

Last week I posted a link to Dr. Garcia's website and my video on there. What I had forgotten, until yesterday was that I also wrote a 'story' for their page, and it's also still on the website.

What a reflection and a look back at 'Round 1', as I've apparently dubbed it. This is the paragraph that struck me as I read this again after so long.

This is flat-out absolutely the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. I know, and I’ve told others, until you’re ready to make the lifestyle change it will never, ever be successful. I was ready, I committed to the change in my lifestyle. I didn’t do this as a diet program; I did this as a lifestyle change. I did this to lose weight, look and feel fabulous and continue on living a completely different lifestyle than what my body has become used to for the past 23 years. I live my life today, completely different than I have any day in the last 23 years. First off, I live life for ME today, but what that means, is I do the things I need to do to take care of myself. Realizing, finally, that if I don’t take care of me, I’m no good to others! Today, I make sure I have time to eat properly. I plan my day and my meals, I work out or plan not to, but I am making conscious decisions.

That pretty much sums it up. It's my reason for wanting to do "Round 2" and my reason for making a commitment this time to pay attention, EVERY day!

This past week was a great week. Food wise, there were no struggles, unless you count watermelon, dang fruit gets me every time. But, it's not like I ate a bag of Skittles! Medication wise, I think I took every dose, pretty close to on time! Water-was much better than other weeks, for sure!

I also did some measurements on Saturday morning and what a great feeling that was! I rejoined the gym in October and my 'free trainer session' included measurements that day and then a month later. However, that was of course, before the restart.

Dr. Garcia's office also does a waist measurement at your first visit now, so I had that as well, but I'm happy to say, that since October 27 I have lost a total of 23.75" total, from shoulders, bust, waist, biceps, hips, thighs & calves. I'm pretty darn happy with that!

Sometimes I can't tell a difference when I look in the mirror as far as a pound here and a pound there, but I do know I'm wearing clothes that I have had that my boyfriend hasn't seen yet, which tells me that it's been at least 9 months since some of those things have fit. Knowing I can fit into my closet FULL of clothes, slowly but surely has been very gratifying. I don't feel like I'm losing sizes as quickly this time around, but I guess in Round 1, I for sure, started much heavier so the sizes seemed to drop pretty quickly to start with. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy...very happy, it's just different.

Today's weigh in appointment was a little hectic. I double (er, triple) booked myself with that appointment, a conference call and an appointment with an agency, so I was running like crazy, but managed to get in and see how the week went as far as the "numbers" go. It's all about the numbers in the long run, I suppose.

I'm happy to report that I reached a milestone today! Today's loss total was 3.4 pounds for a nine-week total of 31.4 and because of going over the 30-pound benchmark, there's a bonus!! Well, I consider it a bonus! This week I can start adding some other foods in. Mainly, tomatoes are now on the list, as well as Almond Milk (which makes great protein shakes and lasts longer than regular milk) and Sea Bass, Turnip Greens, although I wasn't losing sleep over those! I can also add in apricots and plums.

I couldn't be happier with the progress and the direction things are going. It's been super hot outside, so that makes it easier to drink the water and don't you know the first thing I ate at lunch today was a chicken salad with tomatoes in it! Dang it was good!!

I continue on...another 16 or so pounds, with a target date in my mind of when I should be there...we'll see if I can make it!

Here's hoping you all have a fabulous week, mine is shaping up to be fantastic!

Week 8 - Late Thinking & "Celebrity" Status

2011-04-26T21:54:00.000-04:00

What a week...as I reflect back on all this past week brought it was incredibly busy but all in good ways...mostly! I realized though, busy means I don't always give myself enough time to think about ME and what I should be doing, when I should be doing it.

I can count more than a few times this week when I was a 'late thinker' when it came to the program and what I was doing, what I was accomplishing, or not! I mean, I essentially don't deviate from protein, 'healthy' carbs and water, with the occasional cocktail. Yes, to those of you who know me well that are reading this, everyone has a different definition of 'occasional'!

However, this week...as I reflected back, after weigh in, I realized there was more than one occasion that I thought "after the fact" about what I did. The first one was on Tuesday night when I had a work dinner at Ruth Chris Steakhouse. First of all, fabulous! Second of all, I also ate lunch out that day. Lunch I had salmon and steamed veggies, all good stuff, no problems, no issues...on target all the way. Dinner I had filet medallions with shrimp, no butter, asparagus and a Caesar salad (no dressing, no croutons, lemon wedge on the side). I also had a couple of cocktails. That dinner was amazing. However it wasn't until I started typing this blog that I thought back to that entire days and said, UM...duh! Out of the 16 servings of protein I can have in a day, only four of them come from "lean" proteins and the other 12 are considered "very lean". Not typically an issue, except when you eat steak and salmon for your only proteins of the day (other than breakfast) and there was more than four ounces! OOOPS! That's oops # 1.

Alas, we didn't stop there...the next day Todd cooked dinner for he, Elise & I and we had steak and veggies and salad and I stopped during our salad making and picked out my salad before I ever finished making theirs...way to go, me! Dinner was excellent and we then started coloring Easter eggs, while snacking on the fresh fruit Todd had cut up. I absolutely love fresh fruit this time of year. Strawberries just at the peak of freshness and pineapple, chilled and sweet...YUM! So we all went to town on our healthy dessert. I got home, and don't you know...pineapple is not on the list! Eight weeks on this program (the 2nd time around) and you'd think I could know that...but I never even thought about it, until it was too late.

So, you're thinking now, well, that's got to be it, what else could she have done?! Ahhh, along comes Friday night. We went out to see a friend who is starting to play with a new band, we had a cocktail or two and by the end of the night we were chatting with all the people left in the bar and all the band people. In case you didn't know, I talk to everyone! :)

We were hanging out with some people I knew from a year or two ago and they decided we should do a shot...with Red Bull...something I swore off, a long time ago. That is, until Friday night, apparently. When did it dawn on me, you ask? Oh, I believe it was Sunday, as I was downing a gallon of water and trying to think of how I had done this week, since my weigh in was Tuesday instead of Monday. That's when some of these things hit me in the head.

I really need to pay attention to what I'm doing a little closer. I have the food list, shoot, I know the food list. I just flat out didn't think. Of course, last night I was stressing out over it, but really, at that point my fate was pretty much sealed for weigh in today.

Let's chat about weigh-in today...If nothing else, this brought a smile to my face while I was there this morning.

When I signed in, there was a few new people in the front, and when the medical assistant came to bring me back, she was new too. She mentioned her name (and I feel awful that I forgot it) and that she was filling in from the Sarasota branch. She then proceeded to tell me that I looked very much like the "lady on the website" to her, and she wanted to know if that was me. I said yes, unwillingly, since that "lady on the website" is still 20 pounds away from goal, but...I said yes.

She was thrilled, she thought that it was awesome that I was there and that she got to meet me. She called me a celebrity and said she was excited she'd gotten to meet "a celebrity". I reminded her that while I thought that was sweet, I was so NOT a celebrity! She was very sweet and she made my visit a bit brighter for sure. I sometimes run into people who mention to me that they saw an ad with me on it. Dr. Garcia's office still has my video on their website (insert shamless plug hyperlink here: http://garciaweightloss.com/t-videos.aspx) :-)

As well, the office has used my photos for mailings and advertising around the Tampa Bay area. I remember once a guy I work with told me he saw me in his mailbox. That was before restart, and I'm pretty sure I wasn't fitting in his mailbox, but the Val-Pak ad was there. He thought that was pretty cool.

Anyway, all that being said, you'd think I had a horrible week, and now that you've been patiently reading, I'll let you know how it was.

This week I ended up with a loss of 0.8 pounds and 1.5% body fat. Nothing to shake a stick at after the week of late thinking that I had, for sure. For those of you keeping track, that brings the 8-week total to 28 pounds.

That's about equivalent to four newborn babies, 112 sticks of butter, 5.5 bags of sugar, the weight of a car tire and then some...I went back and looked at "Round 1-Week 8"...I wish I would stop doing that, because I was further along in my progress then, but...I wasn't anywhere near as comfortable with the belief that I can do the maintenance and will not have to do this for a "Round 3"...I need to stop looking though! It is ... what it is ... my lifestyle is much different now, I exercise better, I'm losing inches...maybe next week I'll post those, some of them are dramatic to me, yet I've not even told anyone! :)

This week I also decided to purchase some of the protein/carb supplements. Sometimes I have a hard time getting all of my servings in, so the shakes/puddings and the snack bars might help with that. I definitely need to pay attention there, though, and plan my days out. Those are equivalent to the "lean" protein, and we know what happens to me there!

For now, I keep chugging (water) along, on to the next week and those results. This week I'm hoping to hit at least 2 pounds of a loss. I have a 30-pound goal treat in mind and I can't wait for tomatoes to be added to the list!

Once again, to those of you who put up with me through the day to day, meal to meal aspect of this program and have yet to give up on me...thank you! I couldn't do it without the support of my friends, family and Garcia-Carrollwood office staff! You all are the best! Have a fabulous week, I know I will!

A little behind...Weeks 6 & 7

2011-04-20T20:13:00.002-04:00

My apologies to everyone! Work has been crazy and I just haven't had a lot of time to think about my blog posts.

I try to post something meaningful and an accurate depiction of my week (or weeks in this case), along with realizations, struggles, challenges, successes or whatever the case might be. Sometimes I know days in advance what I want to blog about after my weigh in result and other times my creativity just hides and I can't think of anything meaningful.

A few weeks ago I was going to post in regards to being someone who likes to maintain control over every aspect of my life, yet, apparently my weight issues/struggles are something I can't 'control' unless I pay full-on attention and use the resources from Dr. Garcia's office to help me hold myself accountable. It just sounds funny to me that someone who is a control freak needs accountability!

Live and learn I guess, because during Round 1 as I was closing in on my goal, I didn't think I'd need the accountability that standing on the scale gives me on a weekly basis. I think I thought I was successful, I learned what I needed to do, so I could just "do it"...but when I wasn't checking in, I quickly learned it was easy to not do it and not have to think much about it.

This time...no doubt about it, maintenance is mandatory! I have an incredibly supportive circle though and they encourage me to do the right things, remind me to drink the water and assist me in every aspect of the program.

SO over the last two weeks, and if you've made it this far in this blog post, you should know, I wrote this post last night, while coloring Easter eggs with Todd & Elise and I posted it...however, just found out it only posted a portion of it...so if the thoughts seem a little scattered it's because I just emailed all of you and told you it was done...then it wasn't!

So...the last two weeks. The end of week six proved to be a successful week with a 2.8 pound loss for a total of 25.4 and week seven ended with a 1.8 pound loss for a grand total to date of 27.2 and I really couldn't be happier. Well, I could...it's prime time for tomatoes here in Florida and I can't have them until I hit 30 pounds...then I'll be really happy!

I have also made the decision that I am going to continue for another 20 pounds. If I do that, I'll be 5 pounds more than when I hit goal last time. I heard from several people last time that I went too far and so maybe 5 pounds will be ok. I've asked Jen and Todd, the people who see me the most, to keep this all in check with me though. Last time I didn't necessarily think I had gone too far down in weight but other people thought I did. This time I've reached out and asked them to let me know when enough is enough if they think so before I do.

To all of my support system though, thank you so much. Without you all, I wouldn't be able to continue this through the daily struggles of "life" getting in the way. Sometimes it's easy to just run into somewhere with a drive-thru and make a quick, non-healthy choice, but even when we are sometimes in a hurry to get home from what we've been out doing or we need a quicker lunch than normal, my friends, boyfriend and family all make that sacrifice for me to be able to find something I can eat other than fast food. You guys all deserve an award for putting up with me as well!

Thanks, again...now I'm off to have lunch and drink another liter of water or two, before 3:30 this afternoon...today's water goal!

Completion of Week 5....And a busy week it was!

2011-04-04T21:43:00.000-04:00

Another week down! Week 5 seemed to be an incredibly busy week for me. I traveled for work to Sarasota on Monday/Tuesday for agency meetings and then Wednesday through Friday to Orlando for a convention and then had a pretty busy weekend as well. We had a few days of really crappy Florida weather as well this week.

When we arrived in Orlando, there were tornadoes, super high winds, chairs on the pool deck blown over on top of each other, just a big mess...and don't you know it was as soon as we got out of the car to get into our room!

I don't think I ate more than two meals at home last week, including breakfasts. Dinner out each night, lunch as well. That used to be enough to freak me out regarding having to stand on a scale on Monday mornings, but really, while at times the choices were a little boring, it was easy to stay on track with the food plan this week.

My struggle this week with the travel and work commitments was more on exercise and drinking the water. I didn't make it to the gym all week, didn't do anything while traveling, the weather was awful until our last day in Orlando, and then the weekend was full of beautiful weather and lots of time outside enjoying it, but no exercise...ooops!

It's difficult to drink the water when I am working some days. Sometimes it's super easy and I'm thirsty all day and that makes it easy to drink but sometimes I just kind of forget to drink it. I know that probably doesn't make sense but I get busy doing other things and forget about the water. I've never been good at just drinking water. I'm not a big fan of water, it's rather boring. I know it has a ton of benefits, but it's just blah! I'm on a mission this week to finish the water every day, though! We'll see how that works!

I'm happy to say that even eating out every meal for the week, this morning's weigh in showed a 2.8 pound loss, for a total of 22.6 in the five weeks. I also managed a body fat loss of 1.2%. Completely not sure how that happened, but I'll take it!

I'm happy with the progress, and know that "round 2" has been so different than the first time through the program. I'm committed to keeping up with maintenance one I hit the goal this time and I know my support system will help me to make that happen!

So, off to drink the last of the water for today...have a great week, everyone!

It's the end of Month 1---Week 4---Round 2!

2011-03-29T20:55:00.000-04:00

I know, the titles are boring...feel free to suggest something a little more exciting!

Another day late on blogging, but I'm traveling for work this week and sometimes I just can't fit one more thing into my day. I got to my hotel room last night at midnight-not about to start then!

Work is crazy when we have Agency Expo weeks, a few different cities, a lot of agents and the same message over and over and over again...wait...that sounds like a complaint...Always good stuff, but lots of moving parts to setting up an agency meeting and working with hotel catering staff. Which brings me to a great point...(see, this was going somewhere)....

Did you all know...The hotel catering staff is happy to accommodate special orders for food for your guests (or yourself if you are the guest) attending a meeting? All you have to do is ASK! Why do you care? Well, you are reading my blog, either because you are part of Dr. Garcia's program, staff, stumbled upon it because you were bored and clicked that "next blog" button, or you are my friends and family who I shamelessly send an email to every week, encouraging you all to read this because it's about ME! LOL

Anyway...why do we care? Well, because typically our lunches for agents are comprised of chicken (mass amounts of people, chicken is relatively safe)and some sort of a STARCH (BAD!) and then some sort of a SAUCE (really BAD!) and maybe, maybe some veggies and we can't forget the decadent desserts. I've so far, attended two events in the past week...two special order lunches for Michelle to stay on program. Chicken (no real option there) and steamed/grilled veggies of my choice typically, with my ever so famous "Ceasar Salad w/ no dressing, no croutons & slices of lemon wedges" (I think my boyfriend could order my salad in his sleep he's heard it so much!) Y'all should try it, it's really tasty!!

I'm just super happy to say that really, there isn't anywhere that I've been in the last month that I've had to say "yeah, there's nothing here I can eat". I'm still eating out, I still very much live my normal week, whether it's eating lunch in my car on a drive from agency to agency, out to lunch with friends, out with an agent or whatever. The only time the choice started to become difficult was at a hockey game last week. I was desperately searching for something from a concession stand that I could eat...Thanks, Outback Steakhouse for providing me with Steak tips and mushrooms, and by the way...those fries you put in my basket, ya know, the item that there was the most of in my $9.50 supper...yeah, those...I didn't eat a single one of them...HAH!

So today, I want to really remind you all that in everything that we do, whether it is diet, health, job, family etc... we have choices. Our choices, of course, have consequences. As long as you are informed of your options and clearly understand the consequences, the choice is yours to make.

I've consciously made choices every day, several times a day, to stay on program, to do what I am doing because it's the right thing for me...and have really brought back my whole feeling of it doesn't matter what's on my plate as compared to yours. It's the exact same premise I used in "Round 1" of the program, and it works. However, it only works when you consciously make an effort to choose the path that you know to be the right one for you. I choose to stick directly to the program, some people may deviate and not "give up" things they feel they don't want to go without. I know what I'm doing works for me and I hope you are all making the decisions that work for you.

It doesn't bother me in the least to sit in a movie theater, holding a bag of popcorn and not eating any (I was sitting in the middle of the popcorn eaters!!) Don't get me wrong, I stuck my head in the bag and smelled and smelled and smelled that popcorn...but that was it. Smelling has no residual effect on the size of my ______ you can complete that sentence however you see fit!

So all of this crazy talk about choices and consequences and meetings and stuff, all good things, so it must have been a good week, right? Well....

To close out the first month, week # 4 produced a 4.4# loss for a total of 19.8 pounds for the month. I just looked back at Round 1-Week 4 completion and I was at 22.2...well, I have nothing to say on that. This time is different and maybe I should stop comparing where I was to where I am. The one thing that isn't in that post though is a few measurements. They now do waist measurements at the beginning of the program and then at each monthly interval. I lost 4.5" in my waist this month...My clothes are too big, kinda frumpy looking...but I have a closet full of things I can switch to, and gladly!!

So, things are going well. Choices are being made and I couldn't be happier with the progress. As for now, it's time for more water...more and more and more!

Thank you all for your support, encouragement, comments you leave here, emails you send. It's encouraging to me and it makes it so easy to write this every week!

Remember to make the best choice for you, every day, in whatever it is you do!!

Until next week....Happy Spring!!! (And for those of you still in snow and ice...uh, sorry....my pool is ready for visitors!!) xoxo

The Completion of Week 3

2011-03-25T17:21:00.000-04:00

It has taken me all day to decide what I want to write on here tonight. I truly am not up to talking about my week and the result of the weigh in today. That being said, with me you get the good or the bad, it is what it is.

I'm incredibly disappointed in the result of today, yet I can't wrap my head around why. Usually you don't read the result until near the end of the post for the week, but I'm just going to spill it. This week I stayed the same. I know, I didn't gain, and actually lost body fat, but I'm incredibly annoyed by having "maintained" a weight I despise for another week. So, why did I stay the same...well, I think there are a few answers to that question. All of which I have spent the day beating myself up about.

First and foremost, I am not eating all of my "allowable" servings of food in a day. I track on the BalanceMD program everything I eat, and there are several days a week when I have servings left over as I'm crawling into bed.

Wow, it's taken me the entire week to get back to this...I started writing on Monday night and the days and nights have been crazy this week! So...where were we...

Not eating all of the food servings is not something under the guidelines of the program. It's important to eat everything allowable. I have a hard time with that when I'm not feeling hungry, but I suppose at least what I am eating is healthy stuff!

The other issue with the "stay the same" I believe, were the choices I made on Saturday night. We went to dinner with friends on the beach and I made the decision to have a drink. Then, another, then...anyway... I drank Margaritas, with salt...and mentioned to Todd that I was really, really going to need to drink A LOT of water on Sunday to offset this...well...Maybe I should have indulged in something different, maybe I should have had one or two drinks...but it was a choice I made with each round. It's clearly my own fault.

That being said, it's days later, and I've accepted the "stay the same" and have been giving my all this week to make sure I eat the right amounts of food, to drink the water and do what I need to do, other than exercise...but that's going to be in next week's (Monday night's) post. I wouldn't want to ruin all the fun for you now! LOL

Here's to remembering choices have consequences, some good...some bad...some relatively insignificant...but always a consequence.

Better weeks ahead!

The Completion of Week 2

2011-03-14T21:18:00.000-04:00

I hope you all had a great week! Today ended week # 2 of the restart and I honestly couldn't ask for things to be going better in every aspect of my life right now.

As you know from last week's post, at the end of the week last week, phase 2 of the program started and the addition of 'healthy' carbs were introduced in the form of fruits and vegetables. There couldn't be a better time for fruit and vegetables to be a big part of my menu plan every day. It's peak strawberry season here in Florida and they have been wonderful! I love the availability of all of the fresh fruits & vegetables we have access too, makes it easy to plan meals for sure!

While things are going well, there were a few little challenges over the last week. I was on the phone with a couple of people through the week this week who don't understand when I say that this really has been easy. I know I just said there were a few little challenges, but 99% of the time, the program is easy. I honestly don't even have a desire to do something that's not on the program. The challenges come in where it is occasionally (one day this past week) incredibly difficult to drink all of the water. The other challenge is in finishing all of the protein servings allowable/recommended in a particular day. I wrote a bit about this last week but it seemed to be a bit of a challenge every day this week. I know I need to eat a larger breakfast and that would help that a lot, but it's difficult to get up early and cook breakfast for myself!

As far as sticking to the program and not having a desire to deviate, for whatever reason, it honestly doesn't phase me a bit. Yesterday I spent the day at the Strawberry Festival with Todd & Elise and wandered through the entire day with bottles of water, stops at the restroom (endless!) and when we stopped for Elise to have Strawberry Shortcake it didn't even look appealing to me. It's got to be the meds! :)

Speaking of the medication, that's something I am doing better with this time around as well. I seem to remember last time on the program I frequently forgot to take the meds, and when I remembered, it wasn't always on time! This time, Todd has a reminder alarm set to remind me when it's 4:00, just an odd time of my day for me to stop and take meds, but a text...I seem to always be able to read and respond to, so that has worked great...Thanks, Todd! The appetite suppressant medication honestly makes the hunger 'feeling' really non-existent. I can't remember a time so far since the restart that I could say I was "hungry". It was close yesterday, we had a late supper, but even at that, it was fine. They really do curb cravings.

The other medication is Calcium Pyruvate. For those of you who might not be familiar with what exactly that is, I found a pretty informative article and have copy pasted some of it here:

Calcium pyruvate is a nutritional supplement that combines naturally occurring pyruvic acid with calcium. While pyruvate is produced in the body and aids in the conversion of sugar and starches into energy, calcium pyruvate can help enhance the metabolism and speed up the creation of energy. Along with helping people feel more energized, using the supplement can also aid in weight loss when used in conjunction with a sensible diet and regular exercise.
Because calcium pyruvate helps in burning fat to create more fuel for the body to use, the supplement helps to reduce fat that is retained in the body. Thus, the supplement can minimize the amount of excess fat that is stored around the abdomen and other parts of the body. The additional energy that is generated helps the body to function more efficiently and comes in handy when exercising as part of an overall health improvement regimen. In an indirect manner, this also means that calcium pyruvate aids in mental as well as physical health, since emotional issues often have a physical origin.

Combining pyruvate with calcium creates supplements that will not interfere with any body function, nor will using calcium pyruvate cause the body to produce less pyruvate in the system. Instead, the supplements will enhance the effectiveness of the pyruvate already present in the body and increase the ability to maintain energy for the day and prevent the accumulation of extra pounds. However, calcium pyruvate should not be viewed as a way to eat and drink anything and still lose weight. The product works best when used along with eating lean meats, plenty of fresh vegetables and fruit, choosing complex carbohydrates over simple carbs, and getting at least thirty minutes of exercise each day.

As far as the exercise routine goes, after Week 1 I was able to start back with my exercise routine. Dr. Garcia's office did, however, recommend that most of the exercise be cario and not much on the weight lifting type things since muscle weighs more than fat and that can throw off the goal at this point in the program. I've modified my schedule to add a couple more cardio classes to take place of the weight training classes that I had started previously. Now I have between three & four classes a week that are predominately cardio based and it seems to be working out well.

So, as a recap, food program is going great. I just need to find a way to have a larger breakfast and get all of the servings in during a day. The medication is working how it's supposed to, especially when I take it on time and the exercise program has been adjusted and working well. Things are good....(and you've been waiting, I know...) SO good, that today's weigh in showed a 5.8 pound loss during week 2 and a total over the two weeks of.... 15.4 pounds. It's really hard to complain about that!!

On we go to Week 3...no expected challenges or anything particular that sticks out as a stumbling block at this point. One day at a time, one glass of water at a time, keeps the program moving in the right direction!

To end tonight, a quote that shows the progress, even during a 'restart', by C.S. Lewis
“We all want progress, but if you're on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive.”

And finally, a thank you to those of you who live through this every day with me, listening to me talk about what I ate, what I can have, what I can't, encouraging me to move forward...your support means so much to me, as do each of you! Thank you, again!

Completion of Week 1-

2011-03-07T20:50:00.000-05:00

Once again, I am writing to you all about the completion of the first week of the Garcia program. I certainly hope that this is the last time you ever see a Week 1 post from me! Things are different in my life now, so I'm confident that it will be the last "Week 1" you'll see :)

Just like the first time around, this week was fairly easy to stick to the protein only. Rather boring the first few days, but it's over quickly and then you move on to much more normal meals. The water was something I know is a great thing, but I hadn't really missed all that. Some days it was definitely a struggle to finish it all. I work in sales and when I'm in and out of the car all day it makes it a little tough to focus on drinking all that water. That being said, there wasn't a day that I didn't get through it all, and then some, when you add coffee or maybe a glass of water at a restaurant.

As far as the water is concerned, the two people who are around me the most deserve a big thanks this week. My boyfriend and my best friend both challenged themselves to one day of drinking a gallon of water to experience what I was going through. Needless to say, they understand my need to always be looking for a bathroom now!

There wasn't anything I really struggled with on the program this week, I stayed on track, even through some work stresses and am keeping my end goal in mind. For the most part I remembered to take all of the medication on time, even through a busy week and an incredibly busy weekend landscaping the front of my house. I'd say the only thing at times that might have been a little difficult was actually finishing the 16oz of protein each day. Sometimes I was forcing myself to eat even if I wasn't overly hungry, that's something that I'm not overly fond of, but not sure how to get around it. Breakfast might be a little of a struggle during the week, since most of the protein things need to be cooked. I'm not necessarily a morning person...even though I get up, I'm lazy in the mornings and cooking isn't necessarily something that works into my "get ready for work" routine. Weekends is completely different.

I know, you've been reading and reading and wondering is she ever going to tell us how she did for goodness sake? Well, here you have it. I lost 9.6 pounds this week. I followed along all week with my own scale and a new part of the program this time is an online tracker for everything, so it's easy to track weight, water, food, etc...

I was thrilled with the loss, as you can imagine and with the ease of transitioning back into the program. It's been easy to do with the support I have from my friends and family.

So on to week two, and looking forward to seeing the results little by little.

I Never Wanted To Be "That" Person

2011-02-28T19:19:00.003-05:00

....But, I Am....

Yes, that is right...for those of you who have been reading all along, welcome back. It's the new edition of The Journey, Round 2. Although as I logged on to this site to post for the first time in a LONG time, I realize I said I was starting back a year ago...not sure exactly what happened to that!!

Over the past couple of weeks I have given some serious thought to restarting the Garcia program. It took a couple of weeks to admit that I needed to. Then a week or so of playing phone tag to figure out if I could arrange something to fit in my budget. I was surprised to find out through a couple of sources that the office is still using my prior promotion information on their website and in mailings...ahh, those were the days! :)

In speaking with the office we made an arrangement and low and behold...the program officially restarts tomorrow...I've gone to the restart appointment, I have the medication, I got the injection, I donated my Girl Scout Cookies back to the troop without so much as picking them up...the food & gallon of water portion begins at 6:30 when I get up.

Needless to say the fact that I have to even restart makes me sad, but it certainly is not the fault of anyone but myself and my choices. Kind of funny since I just took a class at work on accountability...hmmm, ironic?

I had a great conversation with Dr. Armstrong this afternoon. As he "welcomed me back" I could not help but laugh because "I never wanted to be that person". He reminded me of a few important lessons
1. Surprise, Surprise...I'm human :)
2. At some point in our lives we all fall off the wagon.
It's not the issue of falling off, it's what you do once
you realize you fell off. Do you do something to get
back on or do you wallow in the dirt and feel sorry for
yourself because of it?

Two great points, even though I'm incredibly frustrated with myself. Let's just say February has not been the month that I wanted it to be from start to finish! However I know the rest of 2011 is going to be spectacular!

So, what happened? Well, quite honestly, I thought and as I write that, that was the issue. I thought, I didn't act. I thought I could handle maintenance by myself. I know what to do and what not to do, I know what to eat and what not to eat, I know how much of it to eat and I know I need to exercise. So, you ask, what happened? Knowing and doing are sometimes two different things. This thing we call "life" got in the way and it was easy to get off track. I will say, my exercise routine has never been more on track, but I think ...no, I know...I used that in my head as a thought of, well..I can eat that because I'm going to the gym. It doesn't necessarily work that way for my metabolism I suppose.

So, now what? Well, restart is tomorrow, and the first few days are the worst. Pure protein, no carbs, no fruit, no vegetables, but a lot of protein and A LOT of water. One day at a time, shoot, sometimes even one meal at a time, controlling the decisions I make will let me reach my goal, again. After that, the accountability of maintenance is not an option for me. The maintenance is necessary. I learned that the hard way!

My mom asked me tonight when I told her about the restart what my "goal" was. At this point, I don't have a "number" goal. I know where I was comfortable...it's definitely not where I am now. When I get there, or get close, I think I'll know. Last time I got a lot of push back on having lost what some people thought was "too much". I don't think at this point I want to go quite that far, but again, as it gets closer, I think I'll figure it out. In the meantime....I'm going to work every day to be a better me.

I have an absolutely INCREDIBLE support system in my family, boyfriend and friends and I know with their help and the support and guidance of the staff at Garcia Weight Loss, I will reach and continue to maintain my goal. In the meantime, look for a new blog post weekly as I'll be keeping this updated. It helps me to track what I'm doing on a weekly basis and how "life" affects my journey.

To those of you who play an active, daily role in my life...thank you. Without your love and support I would never be able to do this. Each of you mean so much to me and I thank you for everything that you do for me, each and every day.

"Thinking well is wise; planning well, wiser; doing well, wisest and best of all."
- Persian Proverb

It's been a long time!

2010-02-07T18:16:00.002-05:00

Well, I just signed on to here to start blogging more for myself. I was going to start a new, private blog to just write some things out and I saw that I hadn't been on here to blog since August!

Guess it's time to fill you all in on where I am. TOMORROW I am re-starting the Easy Diet program. Maintenance has gone okay but at Christmas I stopped caring about what I was doing (what a difference from last Christmas) and have started to gain. I'm done with that and I am going back tomorrow with no holds barred. I've grocery shopped, I'm ready!

I will say as many times as I said I wasn't going to be that girl...it is definitely a choice you have to make with every single meal and every single snack and I'm back to it. I'll be at the gym in the morning. I'll be eating nothing but protein for the next few days to go into ketosis and I'll be back to where I was in no-time.

Dr. Garcia's office contacted me about being part of a DVD that they are doing. It had been a while since I'd heard from Michael and his timing couldn't have been better. It's like he knows he's my little guardian angel and he reached out and I said, ok, silly...you know better. Enough is enough! Thanks, Michael, I know you're reading this! :)

So, I'll keep you all posted, but I am going back on program! Keep me in your thoughts!!

Can You Put A Price On A Weight Loss Program?

2009-08-25T01:14:00.002-04:00

Just before starting Dr. Garcia's program, I, of course, inquired about the cost of the program. I was able to find out in a phone call that there was a price for the initial visit, which included blood work, EKG, weight, body fat measurements, the injections, first month of the Calcium, weekly supply of medication, etc...the works. I also found out that after that, there was a weekly visit fee which included weigh in, assessment and the injection and appetite suppressants. Let me just say, it's not inexpensive, dollar wise.

When I told my parents about the program, after I started it, I brought the booklet that I received during my first visit. I suggested to my father that maybe he should skip the first page. The first page outlined the costs of the program. Well, being a dad...he didn't skip that page. He went right to it. He looked at me and said, you do realize that it's really more than just the weekly costs, right? I agreed with him.

Some of you might be wondering now, so, are there hidden costs that I don't know about? Well, not 'hidden' so much. Things I didn't really think about until he mentioned it...even though I told him "I know". One of those things were the fact that frankly it costs more money to eat healthy. Essentially, and I think I've said this before, I shop the perimiter of the grocery store. For the most part, even on maintenance, I don't eat pre-packaged foods. I shop the meat, seafood, produce and dairy departments. Sadly, it's much more expensive to eat healthy.

Upon deciding to write about the true costs of a program, I did a little research. What I found is that there is a mixture of people who say that eating healthy does not cost more because you buy less of more expensive food. I guess I understand that to a point. Between drinking the water, eating fruits and vegetables, I eat less than I did when I wasn't doing all that. However, the food I buy is definitely more expensive. I guess the jury is still out. I'd love your opinions, please share a comment.

One big issue I had during the process was clothing. I didn't really think I'd drop as many sizes as I did. I bought what I thought was a 'goal' pair of jeans, in the beginning of the journey. I wore them twice, then they were too big. I went through a lot of clothes, quickly. It didn't dawn on me until it was almost too late, that consignment shopping might have been the better way to go. I do, now, however, take the clothes that no longer fit (and there was a TON of them) to the consignment store to re-sell. It's a great way to make some extra cash on things that are virtually brand new. It seemed I had a small window of opportunity for most articles of clothing and some I missed all together and brought to the consignment store with tags still attached. That's annoying!!

All of that being said, the benefits are priceless. The increase in my self-esteem, my outlook on life, my need for less medication, the pure joy of living my life in a healthier, happier environment....there's no way you can put a price on the feeling of being in better control of your life.

“He who has health, has hope. And he who has hope, has everything.”

Almost A Month!

2009-08-17T22:28:00.003-04:00

I just realized it's been almost a month since I posted anything to this blog! Life has been absolutely fantastic on the maintenance program. I've been going to the gym regularly although I had a week and 1/2 away due to being on vacation and working out of town. Leave it to me, to pick the one hotel in St. Lucie West that did not have a fitness center on the property. I won't stay there again! Great hotel, but no gym was a bit difficult for me.

I did, however, meet a girl while I was on my trip who is trying to convince me to run a 1/2 marathon. Now, let me start by saying, we were discussing Tampa, and she said, oh...I'm coming there in February! My first reply-we should hook up and go out and have a cocktail! It's what I say to everyone. Those that know me, know that. We were discussing my program and the amazement in Lisa of listening to part of my story. She then told me the reason she was coming was to run the Gasparilla Distance Classic 1/2 marathon and wanted me to run it with her.

For those of you who have known me 'forever'...you know I ran cross-country in high school. That was at least a billion, ok...23 years...ago, since graduation. I haven't really run since. I've started running a bit at the gym, on the treadmill. I really have NO CLUE how to train for a 1/2 marathon. Nor can I really imagine running 13.1 miles for no reason, but the challenge keeps pulling me to look at the website, read up on training and realizing that I only have 6 months if this is something I truly want to do.

The more I contemplate, the more I'm interested in trying it. That being said, I'm fearful of failure. What if I try it and I can't finish? What if I start with something smaller, like the 5K or the 15K? What if...here's a thought...what if I start with a 5K and build from there?! I don't know. It's been A LOT of years since I've had a regular running routine. I think I'd almost need a running coach of some sort to put me on the right track for training like that. Ahhhh, decisions, decisions. This new lifestyle brings all kinds of options to the table, for sure.

Maintenance, as I said before, is fantastic. I typically stay between two pounds under/over goal and I'm good with that. I've added more carbohydrates into my diet, but still not doing anything 'fried'. I'm mostly making smart choices. I had a date last night and we went to dinner. I had a turkey burger on a whole-grain bun and the salad bar. No fries, even though they sat right on the plate. I've found some really great bread-type alternatives at the grocery store and have finally found some breakfast things that are working for me.

The Zone Diet website is a great resource for dining out and recommending what to order to stay in the Zone at chain restaurants. There's also great links to some of the books, such as The Top 100 Zone Foods or A Week In The Zone. These really help keep me on track as well.

It's been almost two weeks since I've been to the office for a weigh in. I missed last week, due to being out of town but will go in the morning and just make sure things are good! I can't wait to go tomorrow. You get so used to doing something every week and it's tough to miss it. I'm looking forward to getting more involved with the office and their community efforts on this program. I have stopped the volunteer thing I was doing at church and really looking for another place to volunteer. I miss very much doing some type of community service, so I've offered up my assistance and my desire to do something surrounding healthy eating and healthy lifestyles. I just missed a back to school event the office did centered around healthy eating unfortunately. I was looking forward to that event and my experience with Junior League and Kids In The Kitchen, but alas, work travel got in the mix and I was away when the event took place. There are a couple of other things coming up and hopefully they'll be able to use my assistance on those. I need to do something! :)

All in all, things are going great. There are no struggles at this point, again, still just making conscious decisions every day to do the right thing. So far, so good!! Speaking of all good....I just went out to You Tube for the first time in a few weeks and saw that my video has 452 hits...that's just crazy! I received an email today from a client who was sent an email from the weight loss office, she's a former patient and on their email listing I suppose. She emailed ME and asked if I knew I was on the cover of their website! I didn't know, but I love that people are benefiting from my story. I found out after sending an email to the operations director tonight that they showed my testimonial to a lot of people at the back to school event and there's a very positive response to my story. I'm so glad that it might motivate even one person to change their lifestyle.

In closing, I'll leave you all with a promise to blog more frequently and....

A man too busy to take care of his health is like a mechanic too busy to take care of his tools.(Spanish Proverb)

Garcia Weight Loss Promotional Video

2009-07-21T22:57:00.003-04:00

OH MY GOSH!! I know, I know...it takes two weeks to post a blog then you get two posts in two days! Crazy!

I have not had the best of weeks. I've had some issues that I'd rather not discuss on my blog, it's, as some people might say not a diet journey but a life journey, but some parts of life just don't deserve the credit of showing up on here. Suffice it to say, I've ended some of the negativity in my life, and while that should ultimately be a good thing...it's difficult to dissolve a relationship that's been so close for 15 years. Enough of that, on to better things!

Today, however, I had weigh in--my last appointment in the transition to maintenance phase of the program and now I just go for a weekly injection and monthly maintenance appointment. As I blogged about yesterday, I've also been working out like crazy. Keeping in mind that muscle weighs more than fat...here it comes....I gained. At least I gained in maintenance and I know exactly why. I gained a pound, but I also lost 1% body fat in the past week. I think I'll take it. There's definitely a difference in the toning that even I can see! Two days this week I've been shopping and I wear a size small in shirts and either a 2 or 4 in Misses pants, or a 3 or 5 in Juniors....I'll buy that ALL DAY LONG!

Anyway, that's not all that happened today. After the weigh-in and being "okay" with the gain, I received an email from Michael at Dr. Garcia's office that the link to my video was on YouTube and ran out to watch it as soon as I got home from the mall.

I was absolutely thrilled with the video. It's really hard to see myself transition from the person in the photos in the beginning to the person in the end of that video. Funny enough, yesterday I posted about people expressing more of an 'interest' in me now than maybe prior to the program, remember? Well, today, I was talking to my work counterpart in Orlando who said, because, sometimes Kyle is my voice of reason....ya know, if you were happy with your look before you wouldn't have done what you did. So, does that make you superficial, too? Alrighty then...guess he has a point. So, that will be the end of that topic of discussion!

Here is the link to the YouTube video: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghV_YBG1aeU
You'll probably have to copy/paste it into your browser, I couldn't get Blogger to show it as a link....sorry!

I'd love for you to take the time to watch it if you're so inclined. As well, if you do watch it, please rate the video for Dr. Garcia's office. Michael did an amazing job putting it all together. I so look forward to the work that I'll be doing with them on this and on any initiative they can use my help in.

They are doing a Back to School event that will incorporate healthy eating for kids and I've offered to be a part of that. Those of you who are reading this that are my Junior League of Greater New Haven friends...think Kids In The Kitchen! LOVE IT! From a girl who loves to cook, loves kids and wants to now help them focus on eating healthy so they never have to do all this, it's going to turn into my new passion! I'm so excited tonight and in such a good mood I can hardly stand myself!

In closing, I challenge each of you to find your passion...and learn to live it!

“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.” Mitch Albom

And since there was no quote in the last post, we'll end with this:

“Nothing great in the world has ever been accomplished without passion.”

True Intentions

2009-07-08T23:35:00.001-04:00

Gosh--I started this blog post a week or so ago and never really was able to stop long enough to write it and post. It's been a crazy few weeks for me. Well, actually, it's been a crazy two and 1/2 months with work and still to a point getting settled into the new house.

Work is different in that as part of the Florida leadership team, most of my time is spent working in the office (yes, home) managing the business that my team of reps is out promoting. Since May we've had revisions to programs and the leadership team has also been out promoting with our reps. That means instead of being in the office all day, handling the management of things that the reps find as well as special projects...we on the leadership team are out in the field, all day. That creates specific work for us, while our other work is not getting done. So, 10 minutes into that, you're behind! Try that for 5 weeks....OH MY GOSH! I've been catching up on work at night and we've had conferences and conventions on some weekends. It's just been very busy. Busy in a good way, but very busy. Anyway, enough about work, this blog is not at all about my job or any of that.

As far as how the maintenance portion of the program is going....tomorrow is my last regular "transition to maintenance" visit. Things throughout maintenance are going very well. I've managed to stay under goal and usually float somewhere within a pound under when I'm there to weigh in. I'm starting to really add foods back in on my own now as well. Last weekend I added...are you ready for this? BREAD! I ate from Subway on my way out of town last weekend for work. I ate a 'wrap' for lunch one of the days, and toast at breakfast and still managed to be under goal.

I know I mentioned last time I posted that I had joined the gym and it had been a week. That I was attending a class or two a week and it was going well. I've managed to work my way up to at least three visits a week. Most of them classes. There's a great water aerobics class. You laugh, thinking, how difficult is that?! Well, let me tell you, the class was great, but I didn't really think there was too much I was getting out of it. The next day told me otherwise. It's amazing the muscles you work out in the water, not realizing you're doing so. Besides that, how much better can it get than a cardio and toning class for an hour where you don't sweat!? A nice relaxing 10 minutes in the sauna afterwards to dry off and, viola, you're good to go! They have that class three days a week at my gym, I usually make one or two of them. As well, there is a kick-boxing cardio class on Monday's that I love. Usually on Monday's I have the need to punch on a punching bag for a little while, so that's always fun! This past week, in an effort to calm down some drama in my life and some emotions I was trying to escape from, I also took a Pilate's class. It was really different but I enjoyed it. There is definitely an opportunity to be there and take a class six days a week if I could find the time to fit them all in!

This particular blog post is entitled True Intentions and it's because of a little battle I am having within myself. As I've mentioned before, the whole 'dating' thing is rather new to me. It's odd though, how I find that there are guys in my life that seem to have taken a different look at me today than they did a year ago. I don't want to call anyone out, mention any names or anything like that...but just frustrating that someone I might have been friends with or acquaintances prior to all the changes I've made physically, seem to have a renewed interest in what else might be available to them with me. I mean, I guess there has to be some sort of physical attraction in order to want to move forward...but it's just a struggle I have with what might be perception that I am a different person than I was when I was heavier. That being said, there's people that I am meeting today, that didn't know me prior to all of this and I guess it isn't much different. I don't know...maybe you just don't know someones true intentions ever, anyway. I don't even know if this makes sense as I type it.

Anyway, not only has it taken me a week or so to write this blog, it's also taken me all day to finish and post it. It's been a drama-filled weekend and tonight tops off the end of the weekend with the news that one of my oldest friends has lost her father to his battle with cancer tonight. I'll be leaving town this week, either Tuesday or Wednesday to head up to Deltona and be with her and her family. Lynne and her family have been in my life for 20+ years, her girls are like daughters to me, and there is no place else I'd rather be right now than with her in her time of need. As soon as the arrangements are made, I'll be on my way to help.

This week, there should be a video listed on the Garcia website, I believe. It's part of the testimonial program. It's an audio clip of question and answers as well as a photo slide show of before and after pics. I'm not thrilled about the before pics, but obviously, that's why the program came in to play! I wish, but not, there was a way to re-do those before pictures!

In closing tonight, I just ask for prayers for Lynne and her family in their time of grief. Lynne, when you read this, know that I love all of you and I'll see you soon.

Maintenance and The After Pictures

2009-06-30T00:32:00.004-04:00

Maintenance is AWESOME!!!

This is the first full week I've spent transitioning to maintenance where I've actually added in foods. It's been great. Granted, I didn't go this morning for weigh-in, but I'll do that in the morning. Things were kind of crazy this morning and tomorrow will work out better. This week's appointment is just weight and a shot, so anytime was fine.

This week during the transition, I have added whole wheat pita bread pockets, only one per day though. I've also added some fat free/sugar free pudding (it's good!) and have sort of begun to eat "normally" for my 'new normal'. For example, today at lunch I had a Black & Blue Steak Salad, easy on the blue cheese, no fried onions, dressing on the side. It was great!!

This weekend, I was busy, all over everywhere. Debi spent the weekend, I had the photo session, went to my mom's, went to see the band play in both Zephyrhills and a pit stop in Davenport on the way home from mom's with Debi. All in all we did good, great food choices, no issues what-so-ever.

The gym has been a great thing as well. I usually do a class once or twice a week (for the whole week I've joined so far) and work on cardio and toning in between. I absolutely love the cardio-kickboxing class. It's a great work-out and I can take out my frustrations on the punching bag as well! It's a win-win!

I never thought I'd become addicted to working out and shopping and eating healthy, but it's fun and easy. The motivation now I believe is coming from the testimonial program that's getting ready to go live. I for sure can't gain the weight back if my face is going to be plastered on billboards all over Tampa, or on websites and the like!! If that's not a motivator, um...nothing is?!

Ok, it's late, I wanted to post the official after pictures from my photo session with Steven Bivens. If anyone is looking for a photographer in the Tampa Bay area, he was great to work with! Steven, thanks so much!! You are awesome!

The before pictures were in the last blog post or two back...I'll not be reposting them, but...here's the after shots (well, a few, there were hundreds!)

The Story...

2009-06-25T22:41:00.004-04:00

What a surprise I have for those of you that have been following this blog since the beginning...

I have been asked and decided to participate in Dr. Garcia's program for testimonials. There will be some print media, radio advertising, possible billboards and whatever else they'd like to do with "my story". While this is all a little surreal to me, I'm thrilled for the opportunity to help others reach their goals through my story. If I help one person, it makes the journey all worthwhile.

So, here's a copy of "The Story" for all of you to read what bits and pieces may be used in the future. Tomorrow I have a 'photo session' with a friend who is a photographer to take some good "after" pictures. I sure wish there was something I could do to have better "before" pictures, but I'm certainly not willing to go back and re-create them! LOL

And....here's the story....

My Journey

When asked to write my “story” for Dr. Garcia’s office, I struggled on where to start. I mean, my weight gain started years and years ago. The last time I remember being thin was the beginning of my senior year of high school.

I remember portion control being a BIG issue. I remember trying every diet under the sun. I’ve tried them all, any fad, lose 10 pounds quick diet. There’s even a diet that you eat beets and ice cream, along with other things for three days. For the record, I hate beets! I’ve tried the cabbage soup thing. I’ve tried Weight Watchers. I tried Slim-fast. I tried at one time even using laxatives, and the only thing I ended up with on that was Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Great!

I’ve been in weight loss support groups. Funny, the support group would meet weekly. We’d starve all day to weigh in, then go to weigh in, meeting and then…yes, go out to eat at a pizza place. I kid you not!

About 25 years ago, my father lost 35 pounds. He’s kept every bit of it off, still today. He eats healthy, he exercises a little bit but he also never forbids himself from having something that he wants. He doesn’t eat a lot of junk food, but once every six weeks or so he allows himself a treat of a greasy cheeseburger. His way is; he thinks, he decides and then he eats. He has a big breakfast once a week, the rest of the week he eats very healthy. I was sure that he thought if I would just begin doing what he was doing and making the same decisions that he is making I would lose weight. I have…I have done the same thing only to return to my “normal” habits, and never having lost “all that much”.

In January 2005 I was due to have some surgery and I was devastated when it was put off because I had to lose 12 pounds in order to have it. I was crushed. It was elective surgery and I was unable to do it until my BMI (Body Mass Index) was in the “right spot”. I think that’s the only time I was ever successful at the weight loss attempt and I kept it off, all the way through the surgery. As soon as that was done, I gained it all back, and then some.

So, why in 2008 after struggling with weight and diet programs since 1986 would I want to start something now? What is different? Why should I expect a different result here and what, on earth, is my family going to say when they find out that I’ve now decided to start yet another diet program. This one including medication, shots, etc. would probably not go over very well.

Actually, telling my family went better than I thought. They were supportive, my friends were supportive and so the journey began. I started the program on 12/22/08. Three days before Christmas. Everyone tried to convince me to wait it out through the holidays, but I think I finally realized that it wasn’t about the holidays. It wasn’t about the food on my plate, it wasn’t about FOOD at all, yet for years, I’d been making everything about food. I wanted life to be about living life and not living to eat. I began to feel strongly that it shouldn’t matter what’s on my plate. If I’m at dinner with my family, my friends, my boyfriend, whom ever…it should be about the fellowship of being together, spending time with the people I love and NOT about what’s on everyone’s plate. Once I realized that, I was good to go.

I committed to Dr. Garcia’s program, started it before I told anyone and never, ever once, looked back. I strictly followed the program. I drank the water. I followed the meal plan. I did the exercise. I REACHED my goal. I had a little; personal ‘goal’ during the entire journey and it was to have “No Gain To Goal” meaning I would post a loss each and every week until I hit my goal. I initially set my goal where it would have been a 62.2 pound loss. However, very early into the program I decided that I wanted to add another 15 pounds to my goal. To date, as I am in the third week of transition I have reached my goal of 135 and was actually under that when I weighed in this week.

This is flat-out absolutely the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. I know, and I’ve told others, until you’re ready to make the lifestyle change it will never, ever be successful. I was ready, I committed to the change in my lifestyle. I didn’t do this as a diet program; I did this as a lifestyle change. I did this to lose weight, look and feel fabulous and continue on living a completely different lifestyle than what my body has become used to for the past 23 years. I live my life today, completely different than I have any day in the last 23 years. First off, I live life for ME today, but what that means, is I do the things I need to do to take care of myself. Realizing, finally, that if I don’t take care of me, I’m no good to others! Today, I make sure I have time to eat properly. I plan my day and my meals, I work out or plan not to, but I am making conscious decisions.

So, here I am, 184 days after the start of the program, down 77.8 pounds and thrilled with my new life. I’ve not taken medication for my IBS or migraines, or barely even Advil since the start of the program. I feel fabulous, I’m healthier than I’ve been in years, and this has done absolutely amazing things for my self-esteem. Again, it has been the best thing I’ve ever done.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Again, over and over again, I thank all of you who have been my support system throughout the six-months during this program. Without my fabulous friends and family I could never have done as well as I've done with this. I love you all, so very much!!!

Transition To Maintenance

2009-06-21T12:58:00.002-04:00

Gosh, it's been two weeks since I've posted a blog...my apologies. Things with work have been a little hectic, and each of the last two weeks have included some travel and late nights working, and late dinners, drinks, you name it. It's finally died down. One more weekend of travel for work, but not until the middle of July. Hopefully the weekend after that one (the 17-19th) I'll be having a girls camping weekend. We're just starting to see if we can make the plans come together to be able to have a girls weekend away-should be much fun!

I had to go back and re-read where we'd left off on this journey. I see that the last post was a mid-week update showing that my scale indicated I'd reached my goal.

Well, as of this week, we're still there. Right at goal in the office and the transition to maintenance has been going fairly well. Last week I received the Welcome to Zone Wellness packet which discusses how to eat in the Zone and discusses how insulin is a key player in controlling metabolism. It discusses the Zone Lifestyle Pyramid, showing that water, the Zone nutrition plan, moderate exercise and stress reduction all work together to help maintain healthy habits.

There are 7 Basic Zone Rules that go with the program, everything from eating within an hour of waking...which will be difficult for me. I'm not much of a breakfast eater, I'll struggle with eating as soon as I get up. Rule 2 is eating 5 times per day, 3 meals & 2 snacks. I think I can do that! Rule 3 is not letting more than 5 hours go by without eating something, again, I think I can do that! The others include eating mostly vegetables & fruits, treating 'carbs' basically, as 'condiments' and keeping the plate portioned to 1/3 low-fat protein, 2/3 vegetables/fruits as well as consuming 8 glasses of water each day. This is a decrease from the gallon that was the start with the program.

Funny, as I flip through the packet, there's a section that discusses "Benefits Of Living In The Zone" and I see those, listed out, but there have been so many things that have been beneficial to me since starting this program, and even since the transition to maintenance. I have a whole new outlook on life, I'm doing everything that I do for me and not for anyone else. I've even started dating. I know, some of you reading this are shocked by that, but that's what happens when you look okay and feel as fabulous as I feel. It's definitely been the best thing I've ever, ever done.

That being said, you're not going to believe this...well, some of you will, because you already know...but the office has asked me for my testimonial. They'd like to use my "story" as part of their advertising campaign. I was floored when the Director of Operations emailed me and asked me what I thought. We met recently and discussed what I might be willing to share with them. The options we discussed were print media, radio and television spots and potentially a billboard. So, for those of you living in Tampa, don't be surprised if you're driving along some day and you see my (UGH!) before and after pictures posted somewhere! It's truly an honor to be able to share my story with people and hopefully encourage them to do what they need to do in their own lives to become healthy. I'm grateful for the opportunity to share my story with anyone who wants to know about it. I know some people don't ask, because it's "weight and women and all...." but I'm so proud of the changes that I've made for me. Not physically proud, because I still don't think it's all that, but the healthy side of things is incredible.

I've also joined a gym. Today was my first session with the personal trainer. It'll probably be my only session with the trainer, he's pretty dang expensive. However, being at the gym, getting strength conditioning and still having a cardio workout option is going to be fantastic. I still have a lot of toning to do, for sure!

Since the Transition to Maintenance phase has started, I've ended all of the appetite suppressants and this last week was able to start adding foods back in. To be perfectly honest, though...I didn't add anything this week. I was traveling for work, didn't have time to go grocery shopping, I could name a thousand excuses...but I just have stuck to the program the way the food was laid out initially. I'm able now to add more protein, favorable carbs (still no carrots-I'll never eat another carrot I guess)fruits & vegetables, and the big addition was adding fats. Things that I haven't had, such as almonds, peanuts, avocados, cashews, oats, macadamia nuts and oils in moderation.

This week I will focus on adding some of the options back in. I need desperately to go grocery shopping, so I'll bring the list (and the book that was recommended, called Top 100 Zone Foods with me to the grocery store so I know what I need to be buying now.

Overall, it's been a fantastic two weeks. Again, my apologies for the delay on the blog, it's just been crazy. I have been promising people a blog update now for a week, and here it finally is. I was able to have a great lunch this week with a new friend, Renea, who stumbled across my blog on google as she was researching the program. Renea lives in Orlando, found my blog, we've been emailing and got to meet on Thursday for lunch when I was in Orlando. It was great to meet you Renea. Thanks for listening to my story and my new dilemmas. I can't wait to hear about your progress.

A little on the personal side...As you all know, I don't typically blog about the "other things" that go on in my life, but ultimately it all will affect the maintenance program and as I discussed with Dr. Garcia's office this week, I'm writing this and keeping it real. It's just me, it's what's going on and it's the concerns that I have. That being said, here's a little twist on this journey for you.

Stress wise--there are some things that have been going on that worry me a little as I transition to maintenance. They're a little personal, but 'most' of the people who read this blog are friends. There are definitely some, I know that read it, that are not friends. I've had a falling out of sorts with some people in my life in the last few months, and I know my blog is being read by some of them. Why someone wants to read something that is hurtful to them, I'm not sure, but it's the Internet, I suppose you can read what you want.

I've definitely noticed that some people are a little put off by the success I've had on the program, but those who have stood by me, day after day for the past 6 months, I value and treasure with all my heart and you certainly know who you are.

That "falling out" with a group of people has led me to some of the most positive places I've been in a very long time. For quite a while, I was living in what I now call the "drama zone" and living in the "drama free zone" today, is fabulous. As I indicated, I've started dating, which, at 40 years old, brings on issues in its own right. This is the little struggle I'm having that could affect maintenance.

I wasn't dating before, I really kind of took a two-year hiatus from serious relationships and was just having a good time being me. There was certainly not a line of men waiting to buy me drinks or take me out when I was heavier. Now, however, that happens. It's a little surreal. I'm not sure I'm liking it, but the fact of the matter is, it happens. It happens darn-near every time I go out, and quite honestly, I go out a lot, so I'm struggling with the 'attention' that now comes my way.

Now that the 'dating scene' has reopened it also means I have to think about things I haven't had to think about in YEARS. Things that a single woman without children at age 40, and wanting to stay that way, needs to consider. Enough said on that, as my friend Laura would say-read between the lines :)

I have some choices to make about the direction to take things, knowing full well that there are plenty of options out there and that many of them have side-effects of weight gain. It's admission time...I'm absolutely terrified of weight-gain. No big surprise there, I'm sure, but I mean...seriously...terrified. I think my biggest fear used to be those dang lizards on my back porch, now it's gaining an ounce or two. So in looking at this new-found dilemma, it dawned on me that the point in time where I started gaining weight was when I was a teenager. It was probably about the time I went on birth control and since now, 25 years later, it's something I have to consider....the fear of weight gain freaks me right out.

So, tomorrow I'll discuss this briefly at Dr. Garcia's office, and I have an appointment to discuss all of my options tomorrow with my regular doctor as well. I know three things for certain, without any question in my mind...as I sit here today, I know I don't want a baby. I know I don't want weight gain and I know that I have to do something. It's somewhat ironic to me that I'm writing this on Father's Day. Those that know me, know that there was nothing I ever wanted more than to be a mom and it just wasn't meant to be. Now, before this turns all sappy, I'm going to stop. The bottom line is that I now have a reason to have to control things that shouldn't happen today. I'm working on that, but I'm terrified of the maintenance of my weight and the options that might be available to me. Enough said.

In closing...have a great week and I promise another update soon....we'll get back on the Monday night track this week!

“Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance.”

A Mid-Week Update

2009-06-05T01:35:00.003-04:00

Surprise! It's a post on, well, technically it's Friday. Rare to see a post on this blog when it's not immediately following a weigh-in, I know. Today, however, we hit a milestone that should be shared with all of you that follow along. If you're my 'facebook friend' then you already saw this post today.

This morning, hours ago, when I did my typical morning weigh in, I weighed in at 1.2 pounds UNDER goal! I was pretty surprised I'd gotten there this week. I was surprised to see it today. It's been a pretty crummy couple of days for me, but this certainly turned my week around.

I was pleasantly surprised I had reached the goal, but admittedly so, really happy to see it below my 135 goal, and liking that number more and more as I think about it. When I weighed in at 133.8 this morning, I wracked my brain trying to remember the last time I weighed that. I tried to remember the last time (if ever, mom?) I wore a size 4 and I wondered how I could get my health insurance to pay for the little bit of 'enhancement surgery' I'd really, really like to have! :-)
I couldn't come up with an answer to any of those questions, just so you know!

Anyway, just a short post to declare the milestone of GOAL MET! I guess it's time to post the "before" and "after" pictures that I talked about during the "Completion of Week 3" post from January 12.

While it doesn't thrill me to post this....it's important to see the progression from the 103.4 pounds. This first picture was taken in April 2006. The second picture was taken in May 2008 and the final picture was taken May 2009. I managed to lose about 25 pounds from the 2nd picture, prior to starting the program in December. Ok, here goes....

So, there you have it. Twenty-three weeks to start a plan to change my life, the way I think, the way I decide and the way I choose to start and end each day making choices and decisions to be a healthier person, for me.

I plan to continue the blog during maintenance as I'd indicated last week. As well, I'm receiving a lot of email from people who have stumbled across my blog that I have been an 'inspiration' to. I'd never thought of myself being an inspiration to anyone, but there are people I've never met making decision to start this program or to keep an appointment they questioned going to, just because they happened upon my blog. If I'm helping people out there, then this little blog has done more than I could have ever asked.

As always, in closing....

"Success doesn't come to you…you go to it."Marva Collins

"The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather in a lack of will." Vincent T. Lombardi

"Desire is the key to motivation, but it's the determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek." Mario Andretti - race car driver

Ok, I could go on and on....but it's late and I need to go to bed! Thank you to all of you who have had a part in the encouragement of me going through this program. It means so much.

Completion of Week 23!

2009-06-02T00:38:00.003-04:00

It's official...the beginning of the rest of my life. Today, I officially began the transition process to the maintenance phase of this program. "Maintenance" is how I will spend the rest of every day of my life.

In knowing that I would be blogging tonight about transition, I searched for some "diet maintenance" links and here's what I found. I'm sure it's no surprise to anyone reading along.

Statistically speaking, about 90% of people who diet and lose weight, regardless of which method, gain every pound back. Ninety percent. That's huge in my opinion. I am of the belief, that the following is possibly why that number is so large. Another article I found entitled..."Life After A Diet" states that after months of hard work and abstinence, you've reached your target weight and return to your regular eating habits. At first, I stopped reading right there. My immediate thought was that was the problem. You simply can't return to your regular eating habits! I did finally read on to make sure that somewhere, the author brought that up, and yes, she did. I truly believe though, that's the problem with people gaining back the weight they lost. The definition of insanity, per Albert Einstein is doing the same thing, over and over again, and expecting different results.

Diet programs are just that...programs. They start, they stop and you go on. If you have not made the decisions throughout the program to change your lifestyle, then yes, I see where 90% can potentially gain their weight back. Those that go into the program of their choosing, with the determination to make a lifestyle change and not just a temporary solution should be successful in their endeavor to, indeed, change their life.

So, today's weigh in was the first one since May 18, because of the holiday last week. I didn't do as well as I thought I'd do. I anticipated two weeks ago, already being at goal. I did have a loss, however. I lost .6 pounds, my smallest loss yet, but still a loss. That brought the total to 74.4 pounds and 19.5% body fat lost.

Today, Dr. Armstrong and I met to begin the transition phase. What I learned today is that for the next two weeks, essentially, nothing changes other than a decrease in the medication and a slight increase in the amount of food I consume. The same food list still applies at this point. I have already started the medication transition. Not purposely, but the forgetting to take it, not taking it because I didn't feel like I needed an appetite suppressant if I wasn't hungry, kind of thing. I don't anticipate the next two weeks being much different than anything else from the past 23 weeks. He felt as though there was no reason I would not reach my 77.2 pound goal before fully moving into maintenance.

His statements to me were super encouraging. He reviewed with me that in 23 weeks, I'd pretty much lost 75 pounds and 20% body fat. The 20% body fat doesn't really do anything for me. I can't equate that to something. Actually, I struggle equating 75pounds to something as well! He said it was "amazing" (love that word, since he used it!) that the average was about 3 pounds a week and 1% body fat per week. He said I couldn't expect any better than that. It was great to hear from the doctor, himself.

He also told me that the transition phase is something to make participants realize that it hasn't been about the medication. That if I approach the transition and maintenance portion of this with the same attitude as I did the weight loss, there should not be a problem at all with maintenance. He said, I need to remember four key things. 1. Think about what you're going to do. 2. Make a decision. 3. Continue to drink the water. 4. Continue to exercise. By chance one of these things gets 'out of whack' the rest don't always work as well together. It made perfect sense. It's the same thing I did to lose the weight. It's all about making decisions. We all make decisions every day, from whether or not to get out of bed and go to work, to what we'll eat, what we'll wear, where we might spend our time. Thousands of decisions every day. The only thing I need to do is continue to make conscious decisions (think and decide) about the food that I eat.

I'm excited about the transition. I was nervous, but I know that I had the right mind-set when I started, and I know I'm ready to keep the mind-set moving forward. I didn't go into this looking at it as temporary. I was ready to make a lifestyle change. I'm still willing and anticipating continuing making that lifestyle change. There, honestly, is still nothing I miss that I'm not getting in my food plan. On occasion, it would be nice to not have to pick carrot slivers off of salad or to maybe have something a little bit different. I know those things will come, and I'm willing to wait it out, do what needs to be done and continue on.

More on the transition to maintenance next week. It's an 8-week process to completely be in maintenance. That includes the Zone consult, learning how to shop in the Zone, dine out in the Zone, eat fast-food in the Zone, a review of beverages and coffee house survival. As always, I'll keep you posted.

In closing...

There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.

Completion of Week 22!

2009-05-26T22:21:00.008-04:00

Since this past Monday was Memorial Day there is no official weigh in this week. However it's technically the end of Week 22 and I couldn't let the week go by without posting!

It's been a crazy week, somewhat stressful, busy at work and just a lot going. It would have been an easy week to throw the whole plan out the window, grab some skittles and have at it. Instead I know that I've made a lifestyle change, and when I was stressing out over whatever it might have been, I chose healthy options. I drank a glass of water, I had some hot tea or I snacked on grapes or another piece of fruit. I went for a walk, I wrote my inner-most feelings somewhere other than this blog. I just did something other than turn to food.

I can remember being on "programs" in the past and knowing I'd be skipping a week for a weigh in, either because of vacation or because of a holiday or something. That's sometimes the time when it's easy to say, I can be a 'little' bad, because, there is an extra week in there to fix what went wrong! I was amazed that I didn't do that this week. I stuck it out, knowing that I'd be going two weeks for a weigh in, and made it through, so far!

I did an unofficial weigh in yesterday, as I do every day, at least once :) just to see where I was to goal. I show that I had a 1.8 pound loss, for a new total of 75.6pounds. That leaves a whopping 1.6 pounds to go to hit my goal. There are people who are going to think I've lost my mind, but the past few days, I've considered going 10more pounds. I'm not going to, but the thought has crossed my mind that it's an option. Because this is where I discuss this journey, I've put it in here just so everyone understands that I did have the thought of continuing to go another 10 pounds. It's part of the process. Deciding and knowing for ME that I am ready to begin the transition is a decision, no matter how many opinions are given, that is only mine to make.

I have an appointment scheduled for next Monday to start the transition to maintenance. I'm not sure exactly what that entails. I have been working mostly the whole time with Kristen at the office, who is absolutely amazing. She's become a friend during this and we have found some commonalities in some very special places. I spoke with her tonight and she will not be the one doing my maintenance transition appointment. I did, however, learn from her that "transition to maintenance' means a lot more options, different foods, etc... The Zone Awareness paperwork that I have discusses the basic principles of any meal or snack. They will always consist of lean protein, 'favorable' carbs and a good fat.

It was great too, to learn from a personal phone call from Dr. Garcia a week or so ago, that I've lowered my risk factors and chances for developing chronic disease by over 100% for things like Arthritis, Asthma, Cancer, Diabetes, Heart Disease and Stroke. It's definitely been a positive health move! I just realized that was in last week's blog too...sorry!

Again, no weigh in "officially" this week, but alas, I do have updated photos. These were taken on 5/23, day 156.

Someone posted on my blog last week and I actually just saw the post. They asked about whether or not I've talked to people who have lost weight on this program and kept it off. I definitely have met people and talk to people every week on maintenance that are keeping the weight off. My comment and honest opinion back to the person who posted was that it definitely is a lifestyle change and not just a temporary solution to a life-long battle and that with the right mind-set you can keep it off. It's all about balance.

In closing, here are some pictures for you and of course, a quote, or two, I couldn't decide which I like better.

“There’s no secret to balance. You just have to feel the waves” Frank Herbert
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving” Albert Einstein

Completion of Week 21!

2009-05-18T22:47:00.004-04:00

Today marks twenty-one weeks or 147 days on the program. I can't ever find any fun facts about the length of time on the program. I googled 21 weeks and all I get it what happens during the 21st week of pregnancy. YIKES! I Googled 147 days and I got that on April 20, it was 147 days until the Buffalo Bills season opener. Quite honestly, given the two options, I'd rather talk about pregnancy. Don't worry; I'm not going to do that to you!

The past week has been, literally, crazy. It was a long week of being on the road, visiting agents, preparing to go out of town for a convention and still a little freaked out by the 6.5 pound weight loss the prior week. I received a phone call from Dr. Garcia regarding the concern from my blog last week about the high loss. He told me not to worry, things looked good. No issues that he saw on his end. He indicated that I'd cut risk factors for heart disease, high blood pressure and diabetes by 100's of percentage points by doing what I've done. He was happy with the success I've had on the program. He reads my blog and told me that I should be proud of this accomplishment as well.

This week I was (again) a little nervous about weigh in. My scale at home didn't move ALL WEEK. I had a stressful weekend and went out for a couple of drinks last night. Not the smartest thing I've done on the program, but I needed a little break. I went out to watch some of the Magic game. Regardless, I did end up with a loss this week. I really thought the NGTG might be done. I lost 1.1 pounds and that brings the total to 73.9 pounds since December 22, 2008.

It's been an amazing ride. After speaking with Dr. Garcia on Thursday afternoon and having another 1.1 pound loss, I've decided that my next appointment will be to begin the transition to maintenance. Dr. Garcia said that I'd still continue to lose a little bit during the transition to maintenance and would as well gain lean muscle mass. So the goal is still 3.4 more pounds, but as I mentioned last week, people are really suggesting to me that I stop at this point. Since I found out that I'm going to continue to lose a little bit as transition to maintenance begins, I'm ready to do that now.

It's been an incredible journey, the best thing I've ever done for myself, by far and now that I REALLY see it, I'm thrilled with the progress. This weekend I bought jeans in a size 4. I refused to believe I was really wearing a four and that the jeans (which I bought the same things in April in a size 10) were just a fluke. Tonight I shopped a little bit at Kohls, size 4 it seems to be. I bought a couple shirts and a jacket and another pair of jeans in the juniors department. I'm not sure I ever shopped in the juniors department when I was a "junior" let alone, at 40! It was definitely an eye-opener tonight. It shocks me how much the stack of clothes that don't fit, just since I moved, has grown. Needless to say, I'm finally proud of the accomplishment and I'm ready for the next phase of the program and of what life brings with it.

In closing, thank you all so much for the love and encouragement you've shown during all of this. Without the people I have in my life making it the center of what we do, I'd never have gotten through it. I'll be indebted to you all forever for putting up with me through it all. Those of you who are reading this that are friends and family, you are amazing. For all that you have said, all you have done and all of your encouraging words, thank you, thank you, thank you. There are so many of you out there that have shown great amounts of support, from my parents, my 'adopted parents', my best friend, my 'adopted daughter', and an entire host of amazing friends, spread out all over the country! You've shopped with me, called and checked on me, posted comments on the blog, watched me eat salad with carrot slivers that I pick off, watch me turn down dessert over and over again and yet, never tried to get me to "just have a little". You gave your honest opinions when it was time to buy smaller clothes, you encouraged me to get up at the crack of dawn to work out, and the list goes on and on! You guys ROCK! I love each of you so very much!

"I would thank you from the bottom of my heart, but for you my heart has no bottom." ~Author Unknown

Completion of Week 20!

2009-05-11T23:57:00.003-04:00

Today was the end of Week 20 and I have to admit, I'm really not happy about today's weigh in. I had a long and stressful week with work and trying to get settled in the house.

I followed the program for the most part, but I missed lunch a few days. I was working on the road and brought fruit and stuff with me for lunch. I ate dinner nearly every night. I have a protein shake for breakfast every morning. I'm eating, I'm drinking water (although, not enough) and I'm occasionally taking the meds. I don't take them regularly anymore, I forget or whatever.

I also finally have now set the Wii back up and can start working out again. It's been over a week since I got in a work-out and over two since I got in a "decent" one. Unless you count unpacking boxes and moving furniture.

So, why was I not happy about the weigh-in? I know you think I'm getting ready to tell you the "No Gain To Goal" ended, but, actually I lost 6.5 pounds. I was not overly surprised, I'd watched the scale all week, and I knew I'd have "a decent loss". I was really surprised when she said, "Congratulations, you lost 6.5 pounds!" It sort of caught me off guard until she said I was under 140 pounds and I had 4.5 pounds to goal.

I left there thinking that was just ridiculous. That was way too much weight to have lost in a week, twenty weeks into the program. It kind of consumed the rest of my day. Replaying my week, trying to figure out if I skipped meals, how many, what I actually ate, etc...

The program total as of today is 72.7 pounds in 139 days. My tracker on my iPhone indicates that's an average of -0.5 pounds per day. If you add the initial 25 pounds that I lost during the transition from Connecticut to Jacksonville to Tampa, that puts the grand total weight loss at 97.7 pounds since February, 2007.

It seems everyone today had something to say about the weigh-in as well. Please know that I'm really not happy about it, although I'm happy about being 4.5 pounds to goal, for sure. This week people have been telling me too that it might be time to stop. "Maybe it's time to say you've reached your goal." "You're too thin." "How much more are you going to lose?" "Are you eating? Are you purging?" and let me assure you, I am eating, I'm not purging. I have absolutely no desire to purge. I feel like I'm on the witness stand for a bulimic woman on trial, but y'all need to know that there is nothing I hate more than vomiting, so that's the last way I'd ever consider losing weight!!

So, here's the bottom line. I have 4.5 pounds to go to reach goal. I have a weigh in next Monday and the following Monday is Memorial Day. It'll be the first Monday I've not been able to weigh during the whole time. I'm thinking...that where ever I end up next Monday might be the final for me before starting maintenance. I can't weigh in on Memorial Day, the office is closed. I'm on vacation that week and thinking that might be a good transition week to maintenance. I guess at this point, or up to this point, we can call the program a success. My original goal date was July 4, 2009. That was also the original loss goal of 62.2 pounds.

All in all I've been extremely happy with the program. I'm definitely a supporter and definitely recommend it to anyone who is motivated enough to do it!

In closing I hope you all have an awesome week. I'm looking forward to mine, now that I'm done stressing about the amount of weight I lost last week. Time to look forward to better things!

In honor of achievement:
"The person who gets the farthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare. The sure-thing boat never gets far from shore." –Dale Carnegie

Completion of Week 19-Keep Swinging!

2009-05-07T00:12:00.004-04:00

I just realized this week is half over and I've yet to blog! It's been an absolutely crazy week with work, unpacking and settling into the new house and planning for a convention for work and I could go on and on and on. I've had to be creative for the convention, yet, haven't really felt all that creative these days.

The move-in to the new house on Friday left little to be desired. I have a feeling it's going to be a little difficult to get things that need to be done through the property manager, actually done here. We've gotten off to a rocky start. Never a good thing!

That being said however, I love the house. It's perfect. The floor plan is great, the location is great and the neighborhood is great. It should be a happy rental time and if the option came up to buy it, I'd consider it at this point. The home has so much potential for an owner! I'll post some pictures after it's "done". For the most part, it's moving along quite well though. There are about 4 more boxes to unpack and then it'll just be getting stuff on the walls and the like. That can always happen.

All in all it was an odd week on the program. I didn't deviate from plan, but I forgot regularly to take my meds. I don't think I took all three doses any one time during last week (and so far this week, too!). Needless to say, when Sunday rolled around, I was a tad bit nervous for Monday morning.

I ended up with a loss of 2.0 this week for a total loss of 66.2 pounds, with 11 pounds to go to hit goal. I was a little surprised. I thought this might be the end of the "No Gain To Goal" streak. Of course, I was very happy it wasn't!

Eleven pounds to go. Almost single digits to reaching the maintenance program. I absolutely can't wait. I can't wait to have a little more cash in my pocket, as this is costing me every time I go. I can't wait to not have to be there at 9:15 on Monday morning and try to arrange my schedule around that. Although, I'm much closer to that office now. I can't wait to be "maintaining" the weight loss, rather than continuing to say, I'm "almost" at my goal.

Exercise has been a challenge the last week or so as well. Needless to say, I packed up the Wii Fit on the night before the movers arrived, but still struggled with working it into my schedule. Work has been really busy and finding time to get things done seems to have let me depart from the regular work-out routine. Time to get my butt back in gear on something. I think I'd like a little more toning workout for a bit, in addition to the cardio that I get with Wii Fit. I need to do something to start toning the skin from where there used to be more of me.

I realized the other night, getting ready to go out to dinner that I really see it now, finally now I can tell! I know, I should have been seeing a difference. Sixty-Six pounds is a lot, but now, I look in the mirror and I don't see the girl that was there at Christmas. While I still see "me", I definitely see a much, much different me. I'm liking that. It makes me want to keep motivated. There have been a few times in the last couple of stressful weeks that I've considered saying, the heck with this....I'm over it. Then I looked in the mirror the other day and thought...you must be crazy! Look at the awesome job you did at this and you're going to let a little bit of negativity and drama change it? NO WAY!

So, I keep swinging, working toward the goal, every day. Getting closer to the goal, every day and looking very much forward to the maintenance program.

Sorry this is so late, and so brief. It's late and I needed to get something out here for you guys! More next week!

In closing....and in honor of baseball season:

My motto was always to keep swinging. Whether I was in a slump or feeling badly or having trouble off the field, the only thing to do was keep swinging.
Hank Aaron

Completion of Week 18!

2009-04-27T17:40:00.002-04:00

Today is the end of the 18th week of the program. To say this last week has been stressful would be an understatement. It's probably been one of the most stressful that I've had since starting the program. I am a person who doesn't like to be at odds with people and to say I've been at odds this week with someone would, again, be an understatement. It's been a little stressful to say the least.

On top of all of that, at the last minute on Wednesday morning I needed to head up to Jacksonville to sign closing papers on the house because the title company did not give correct instructions as to what needed to be signed before I overnighted the package to them.

If there were a week I could have just said, ya know what, I'm over it....I'm ready to be done, I don't care anymore...it would have been this past week. I considered it for a few minutes. I then thought that I've known that there are people out there who have a negative outlook on this diet program. They are not going to get the satisfaction of seeing me fail on the program or on the maintenance. I opted to start this program because I knew it was something I could maintain at the end. I know what I have to do to maintain and the most important thing, I think, is that I don't feel like I'm making "sacrifices" to eat on program. I've said it before, I'm sure I'll say it again...I enjoy what I eat. I don't want to run out and have a bag of Doritos. I'm quite sure I'd be turned off by the smell as I sit here and think about it. Thinking I had support from people in my life and finding out that they truly don't think anyone in their "right mind" could manage to keep the weight off was a real eye-opener for me to prove to myself that I can do this and will do this.

This week, even through the drama, I managed to lose 1.2 pounds and .5% body fat. I'm at a total of 64.2 pounds lost and 13 pounds to go to reach the final goal.

This week I am working hard at getting things packed up to move into the beautiful new house on Friday. There are boxes everywhere, things all over, but it's a work in progress. It's all for good reasons. I'm moving closer to life, closer to work, a single-family home with some space. I know I have a lot of space now, but it's different. I miss having a yard, I miss having ONE floor and I can't wait to get in there and make it home. It won't take long...I'm pretty quick about unpacking and settling in, and it definitely helps that my mom is coming over this weekend to do some of the decorating stuff with me.

After the move and after getting settled I have a couple of weeks of work craziness. This time of year starts our convention season and we have some other initiatives going on that require me to be out of the office every day for a couple of weeks. It's going to be a stressful May. All I can do is take one day at a time and be the best me I can be each and every day at work and at home for my family and friends. Once all of that is done, I think a nice vacation to the beach for a few days might be just what the doctor ordered!

In closing, I hope you all have a fantastic week, I know I will!

“Vacation is what you take when you can't take what you've been taking any longer.”

Completion of Week 17!

2009-04-20T22:07:00.003-04:00

Another week down. I don't have a whole lot to blog about today. There is a lot going on and I have a lot on my mind with the move, work is busy and things are just a little 'crazy' for the next few weeks.

There is stuff everywhere in my house. I need more boxes. It's a bigger chore than I thought to pack all of this stuff by myself. I did decide to hire movers for the actual move day. I can't wait to be in the new place and get settled. I can't wait for SPACE! I can't wait to not have neighbors (whom leave little to be desired) not 'attached' to me on one side. There are a lot of positives in this upcoming move. Anyway, lots going on, and this blog isn't the spot for all that.

I did receive information today on the maintenance program and how that all works. I'm not sure how long I'll be able to afford to continue that part, but we'll see how it goes. I'm not so much worried about the maintenance aspect of this, as I know what I have to do and I'm not willing to "not" do it. I've blogged before about my dad who has lost weight and kept it off for a lot of years, just simply by knowing what he needs to do and doing it. I know I'm motivated enough now to do that.

I've had to shop again lately. I'm having an issue with buying things that only fit for a couple of weeks and then that's it. I finally bought some shorts. Knowing that I'm close to being done, and having two pair that are too big, I went this weekend and finally found some. Shoes have been another issue. My feet are smaller!??! This has caused me to need new shoes. I absolutely hate shoe shopping and I can't find anything that I like. I just continue to wear the same shoes that really don't fit anymore!

So...today's weigh in was great. I was pretty sure I knew where I was going to end up and it was close. I had a busy morning and had to actually leave the doctors office and come back later in the day. I lost 2.8 pounds this week for a grand total of 63 pounds. I also lost 1.8% body fat this week, for a total decrease in body fat of 16.3%. That means absolutely nothing to me though...I can't relate 16% body fat to anything...but it's out there! It's been 117 days and I have 14.2 pounds left to goal.

Things are progressing for sure. Today one of the ladies that works at the check-out at the office told me she didn't remember me from before. When I showed her the "before" picture, she was shocked. Pretty soon, I suppose I'll be showing all of you the actual before picture that was before I lost the 25 pounds I lost between moving from Connecticut to Jacksonville to Tampa.

Once I hit goal, the program total will be 77.2 and the actual, overall weight loss total will be 102.2 pounds. I will have lost almost my entire "new" self. Give or take 35 pounds, but WOW! As I type that, it's a LOT! To know that I had that much to actually lose doesn't make me overly happy. I probably wasted a lot of years not living life to its fullest because of that. I'm just sitting here contemplating things that I haven't thought of about having lost almost 100 pounds.

Prior to beginning the program, I suffered with (let's just call it) stomach issues. Since December 22, I have not taken any of my stomach medicine. It's amazing the difference in not taking those meds, the lack of meds for migraines, because I'm not having them so much. It's rare that I take any meds, other than the 11 prescribed things I take a day for the program!

Well, since I guess I found some stuff to blog about I'll close now that you've made it this far. I just ran across someone else's blog post that listed 101 thoughts on how to lose 100 pounds. There was some great stuff in there, I decided to use a few of them as the closing quote for tonight....enjoy and have a great week!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Restaurants don’t care if you eat everything that you are served. Their goal is to fill you up on free breadsticks, extra soda and alcoholic beverages before your entrée comes so you’ll go home happy…and fat. They won’t be there holding your hand when you get that coronary bypass.

If you eat your meals with overweight people, you will eat more. Period.
If you eat your meals with healthy fit people, you may eat less… and save money.

And, although I disagree with these, here's a few more:

Getting “checked out” is a real mood-booster, even if you are in a relationship.

The first time you walk by a friend you have not seen in a while and they do not recognize you because you have lost so much weight is an amazingly positive experience.

OOOPS---I forgot

2009-04-13T23:38:00.004-04:00

Everyone has been asking for updated pictures...and I forgot to post them! Here you go, from this past Saturday night...

Completion of Week 16!

2009-04-13T18:33:00.002-04:00

Sixteen weeks...It's been 112 days since the start of my lifestyle change. One hundred and twelve days of better decision making where food, drink, exercise are concerned and finally, one hundred and twelve days of people noticing a change in me.

I have blogged about this every week for the past month or so, but it's still something in which I struggle daily. I honestly don't know how to 'get over' the comments, compliments and looks. It's just not something I'm used to. I was out on Saturday night, with friends, for the first time in a long time. I saw people that I haven't seen in a long time. Every time someone made a comment, I tried really, really hard not to roll my eyes, say "whatever" and just blow it off. It's hard. I've given this some thought this week to see what really bothers me about it and I think that it's that I feel like I'm still the same person inside. I guess I feel like people think I'm different and I really am still the same person inside. It shouldn't matter what I look like 'outside' and I think that people are putting more emphasis on that, rather than who I really am. I'm so "not" the "skinny girl". I'm much more comfortable being the girl who would do absolutely anything for her friends and her family. The girl who wants nothing more than for the people in her life to be happy and healthy and who loves God, her family and friends more than anything else.

Okay-so enough about that....the reason you all come here is to see what the result of the Monday morning weigh-in is. Yesterday, I really thought it might not be such a great week. I didn't (still) deviate from the program, but I'm still not drinking the water I should be drinking. I made a pact with Kristin (the MA who weighs me every week) that when I saw her next week, I'd have consumed 7-gallons of water by then! I'm going to do that!!

This week, officially, I went over 60 pounds. I lost 1.5 pounds for a total of 60.2 pounds on the program. From the time I started losing weight, I'm actually down 85 pounds...but we're not tracking that here. I've lost 14.5% body fat and I have 17 pounds to get to the 'updated' goal. I guess (it just hit) that means, if I hadn't changed my goal, I'd have 2 pounds to go, and next week, I'd be starting maintenance! Oh well, it is what it is...16 weeks in, no gain to goal so far and 17 pounds to go.

I'm thrilled about the impending start of the maintenance program. I'm happy to think about starting to add things in that make no sense to me why I can't have today. I mean, it's not like I want to add in a Snickers bar (I hate chocolate) or a bag of Doritos (no desire for them), but to not have to pick slivers of carrot off of lettuce when I eat a salad, or to have an extra piece of fruit or two during the day is something I look forward to! I was discussing eating habits and shopping with a friend this week. We discussed how, really, I only shop the perimeter of the grocery store. Only things that are "from the earth", fresh fruits, vegetables, lean meats, seafood and limited dairy products. I absolutely love the food that I get to eat. The other night I made scallops and filet for dinner, with asparagus and sliced tomatoes. Can't get much better than that!

Anyway, all in all it was a great week. I'm looking forward to a few more weeks of losses and then starting maintenance. I know I can do it, I know I can stick with it and I know I'm ready!

In closing, have a fantastic week!!!

You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through. Rosalynn Carter

Completion of Week 15!

2009-04-06T17:49:00.002-04:00

What a week! Things here at home have been a little crazy, a little busy and a little stressed. I've been looking to move out of my current townhouse into a single-family home and have worked this week on finding something, getting paperwork done and making plans for all of the utilities and the like to be turned on when I move. I'm finally moving a bit closer to "life" than where I am now. I can't wait. I'm excited about the house. I'm excited about the neighborhood, and that I will have my friends MUCH MUCH closer to me once the move is complete. The house is closer to everything I do, work, church, friends, shopping, out..you name it! As you can see, I'm ready to go NOW~but just a few weeks and I'll be in there.

I am still fighting with drinking a gallon of water a day on the program. Since I had company at the end of February, yes, over a month ago, I've not completed a gallon a day yet. I really have a hard time thinking about drinking the water. I forget to drink it. I forget sometimes to even eat--so drinking water isn't something that seems to be top on my priority list. I guess I should put it back up there where it used to be. I've noticed since the increased work-out schedule and the decreased water intake I am starting to get muscle cramps in my legs at random times.

Today, as far as weigh-in was concerned was fantastic. I was down an additional 3.7 pounds for a total after 15 weeks of 58.7 pounds. I have 18.5 pounds to go to the new goal and then start the maintenance program that I have been reading about.

I'm ready to start that program, yet still don't mind the program how it is today. I have gotten a little more lax in the "no alcohol" department. There are the occasions where I'll grab a beer now and again. Usually no more than one and no more than one or two days a week. Apparently it's not been an issue! Then again, I'm not eating as much food as I'm supposed to eat and the beer is 99 calories!

I'm still having the same "me" struggles, but I truly don't see them going away anytime soon. It's a self-confidence issue that I have I suppose. I know I've had it for 20 years (at least!) and lately it's been more prevalent. I suppose because for the first time in forever, I'm hearing things from people I'm just not used to hearing. I guess when you lose almost 60 pounds in 15 weeks it causes people to take notice. I'm not used to the "take notice of me" thing. I think I've just sort of been "around" for the past 20 years and there hasn't been a whole lot of reason to compliment me. I mean, that sounds really bad. There are a lot of things I have been complimented on in the past, but none as "physical" as this process has been. It's just sometimes hard for me to believe it about myself.

It's funny, I never doubt the sincerity of the people who do the complimenting...but I find myself thinking, "ya, ok, whatever...it's just me, let's move on to something NOT about me." Yet, there are people who I call and text immediately after my weigh in, just so I can update them~it sounds stupid as I write this, but those are the people that I never doubt their feelings or what they tell me. Anyway, it's what I feel, so it's here. That being said, after I write the last paragraph, I typically go to a quote website I use and look for something that fits the topic. If this doesn't say it, nothing else could! Now, to start believing it!

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Completion of Week 14!

2009-03-30T23:13:00.002-04:00

Time flies...so they say. It amazes me that 1/4 of the year is almost over. It's the end of March. It's Spring (one of two seasons for us in Florida, not counting Hurricane season) and another season has past.

I can remember being a kid and wondering if time would ever go quick enough to get to the next school vacation or the next trip or the next whatever. These days, I wonder on Thursday, where did this week go?! On Sunday, I wonder where did my weekend go?! Speaking of time, today is day 96 on the program. The completion of 14 weeks of a change in my lifestyle and positive, happy changes in my life. So many things have changed in my life in the past 14 weeks, yet I'm still the same person I was on December 22, 2008.

This week was very successful at weigh-in. Today's weigh-in signified a loss of 4.3 pounds and a total weight loss to date of 55 pounds so far. On my post from December 27th, I posted that the goal was to lose 62.2 pounds. Today, that would mean I'd be 7.2 pounds from my goal. Those of you who have been following this blog, however, know that on March 4th, I added another 15 pounds to the total overall goal. That means, today, I am 22.2 pounds from reaching my ideal goal. I could not be happier than I am right now about the progress that has been made along this journey.

I am still struggling with the fact that I am the same person, yet a different person than I was prior to starting this change. I'm the same girl who I was at a size...yeah, not the size I am today! I still like the same things, do the same things and love my family and friends more than life itself. It's just 'different'. I've never really had a like for myself. I don't necessarily see a thinner me in the mirror when I look. I still see the girl who was hiding from so many things, behind a wall of weight, and a wall it was! Quite honestly, I'm not sure that will ever change. I mean, I see that I buy smaller clothes (and lots of them) and I see that I eat completely different things than I did, and much smaller portions. What I don't see is someone who is a size 8 looking back at me in the mirror. I still, just see me, with the same outlook I had before.

I think I can safely say though, that I am a more positive person today, and I definitely see that. I didn't like the negative, cloudy outlook I had prior to starting all of this. I came home from a vacation in September in a big funk and I hated the person that I was during that time. My friends stood beside me, listened to me whine and cry (lots of crying) and all of the sudden, things changed. I put more faith in God, learned to let go of my past, started to count on my friends more, rather than just being there for them and learned who I truly wanted to be.

I was asked by my best friend this week if I "saw it" (saw what, you ask...keep reading!)...actually I think I was told, I didn't "see it." I don't see how beautiful I am, inside or out. Truth be told, that person was right. I guess I don't see it. I've never been good about seeing the good sides of me. I do what I do for others because it's who I am and it's who I've been for a long time. I used to be pretty selfish, but I no longer want to have a life that revolves around myself. I've changed that. I changed it a long time ago and I'm in a better place for it.

Wow, this blog totally didn't go where I thought it would! I guess we've gone from "time" to "changes". I can certainly say that the feedback I receive on my changes is a positive one. I guess it's time for me to take a dose of my own "positive attitude" medicine and start believing what the special people in my life tell me, every day.

In closing, and I think I say this every week. I am so happy to have the people that I have in my life. My family and friends are such an amazing support network for me. There is nothing in my life today that makes me unhappy and I'm so glad that I can count each of you among the many blessings that I have. I love you all, more than you could ever know.

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.

Completion of Week 13!

2009-03-23T21:50:00.002-04:00

Today marks 13 weeks in the program. Thirteen weeks, 1/4 of a year and 65% of the way to my new goal!!

This weekend, I spent a lot of time cleaning out my master bedroom closet of clothing that no longer fits. I'd done some dresser drawers, and a little bit of the closet a month or so ago, but this time it was full-on "spring-cleaning". Now, let me start by saying, I enjoy shopping. I enjoy shopping for clothes, household stuff, kitchen stuff, anything, really, except for shoes. I despise shoe shopping. Since I enjoy shopping so much, most of my dresser drawers are packed full of things that I haven't worn in, let's just say....a long time. As well, I had no empty hangers in my closet when I started this little project on Saturday morning. I didn't really even know I was starting it. I had company this weekend. They were still asleep; I was trying to be quiet, so I stayed in my room. Boredom overcame me and alas, the closet project began.

By the time I took the first break of clearing out clothes that didn't fit, I'd developed a pile of 46 things hanging in my closet that needed to get out. I was shocked. That was all stuff I knew didn't need to be tried on, mostly shirts that were hanging there for weeks that have been too big. I took a break and went back to it. When all was said and done there were 73 empty hangers in my closet, a HUGE pile of clothes (still) in the bedroom, a laundry basket full and a Rubbermaid container full. A few people have either gone through some or told me they are coming to go through some, but I hope it's soon, because I'm over looking at the piles. It was depressing, but good depressing. There's a ton of money in that pile of clothes, and really, a lot of it needs to be replaced. It's going to cost a fortune for me to replace all this, but it's definitely a good thing. Look out Macy's, Kohl's, Cato...anywhere! It's so cool to be able to shop in sizes 8 and 10. I'm not sure of the last time I was ever able to do that! I probably was too young to shop by myself then!!

Today, as we all know, is Monday. It's the official weigh-in day. I lost 1.5 pounds this week for a total of 50.7 pounds in 13 weeks. Officially over 50 pounds and absolutely thrilled about that! I was a bit bummed by only 1.5 pounds this week, but considering last week was 5 pounds, I guess there's no reason to be disappointed. I'm still keeping my No Gain To Goal attitude and still haven't eaten off of the program.

I find it's easier and easier every day to do this. I don't miss anything that is "forbidden" at this time. I cooked food all weekend for family and friends that came over for dinner. There was a lot of it I didn't eat. The only thing that bothers me about that is the taste of the food I'm serving to other people. I enjoy cooking. I feel fulfilled when I can make a good meal for someone and I truly love being able to share that with the people I love. My biggest fear in that is what if I'm making something and it's not good?!?! I haven't tasted it for the most part, so I'm going at it on 'a wing and a prayer' and hoping it's going to be okay. I used to taste as I went, being able to add things or change things as I was in the process. Granted, nobody's complained, or died, so I guess that's good! Most of the people I cook for read this blog; I'm hoping y'all would tell me if something was really bad. I mean, you keep coming back, so I guess its okay?!?! :)

This upcoming week and weekend appears, at this time, to be relatively calm. It's been a while since there's been a calm, non-eventful weekend at my house. I think I'm so ready for it. I'm hoping the weather is nice, there's a potential boating day on the horizon this weekend. If that doesn't work out, then there's always shopping for new clothes that I can do!

Lastly, I've really been trying to focus lately on having a more positive attitude. When I first moved back to Tampa things were rough. I was angry and bitter about Tom and the divorce, the sale of the house in Jacksonville, just a lot of things.

I think that the past 13 weeks on this program have really given me a different outlook on how my life can be when I focus on the task at hand. I have a better feeling about the direction my life is going. I definitely feel better about myself, and I think that is mostly weight-loss related. I seem to have lost some of the insecurities that I had 13 weeks ago!

I'm happy with my career and the direction that it is going and I'm thrilled to have the best friends anyone could as for. My friends and my family are such an encouragement to me in so many ways. They are all supportive of the decisions I make in my life and have been there to provide their unconditional love when I need it and shoulder to cry on when I need that too. The people I try to surround myself with are positive people. They have a good outlook on life, with the ability to balance their daily lives as well as their hopes, goals and dreams and work hard to achieve them. I strive to have that balance in my life as well and feel like there are things I can do every day to make positive progress in that direction.

In closing....have a positively awesome week!

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined.
Henry David Thoreau

Completion of Week 12!

2009-03-17T22:28:00.004-04:00

Twelve weeks ago today I started this program. I've been posting here every week. Most of you have been reading every week. You've come here to see how the week went, what the outcome was and what the plan is for next week. Most times there's nothing here other than the whole "program journey". Don't worry, this week isn't any different, for the most part. The only thing is, as I looked back at a few posts, there sure have been some things happening that I've managed to push through, remain on the program and not have any issues with. In the past 12 weeks, we've been through Christmas, New Year's Eve, Girls Night, Superbowl, my birthday party-every one of them, my grandmother's birthday party and out of town company.

This week was a little bit different. It was busy, work-wise, but the parties and the company and the excessive opportunity to mess up the program was non-existent. I am still struggling with drinking the gallon of water, I've not completed that every day for a couple weeks. I'm drinking a lot of water, but not anywhere near a gallon. Tomorrow is a new day and I'm going to try to get it done tomorrow.

For the news you've all been waiting for, though...yesterday's weigh in was fantastic. I knew it was going to be okay, but I was not expecting the result of 5 pounds lost for a total of 49.2 pounds. I also lost 2.3% body fat this week. Because I was a day or so away from the 50 pound benchmark, I got to see the doctor as well.

When I went in to see him, the first thing he said, is WOW, you really don't cheat, do you?! I advised him that I didn't, that I can't see spending money like that on something to just do what you want to do. We discussed my meal options and the food I eat and how I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. I eat really, really good food. I certainly don't miss not eating the things I used to eat. That part has been really refreshing. More expensive, but refreshing!

So, it's really going well. As I mentioned last week, I've added an additional 15 pounds to my initial goal, so I've got 28 left to go. At this point, I'm not sure I remember any longer when the last time I was the weight I am now. Sometime between high school and 1992 I suppose, but I no longer can say...."Gosh, the last time I weighed this was ....." Most of my friends today have never seen me at this size or smaller.

I've dropped 5 clothes sizes in 12 weeks. I'm trying not to shop too much (I know some of you don't belive that), but there are things that I have to have. I had no jeans, that's what started the shopping, then I needed work clothes that actually fit. Then I realized all my shorts don't fit. I have another laundry basket of clothes that don't fit, and I've yet to go through all of the shirts in my closet to get rid of the ones that don't fit. I think I've not done that because then I have only a very few things left. Included in the pile of things that don't fit at all are all of the Rays shirts I bought during last baseball season. We have been to two Spring Training games and my 'Rays Gear' is all too big. It's a good problem to have, but I definitely need some different Rays clothes!

The Wii fit workout changes have been going well. I've realized I don't have time for an hour and 15 minutes in the morning. I am doing 45 minutes (with arm weights for 15) one day and 1 hour withouth weights the next and alternating between the two and it seems to be working well. I'm also walking Cocoa at some point during the day. I live on a circle and we walk the circle. Mostly just to get her outside. I have a basket near my front door that houses her leash and she lays in front of that basket and whimpers until she gets to go for a walk. We were going around 11:00 every night, but we've changed that up a bit and now we go after dinner most nights. There are nights when the walk gets skipped, but the workout happens Monday-Saturday, at some point. 99% of the time it's between 5:30 and 6:00 in the morning. Last week, however, I spent the night at my parents house and worked on that side of the state for the day. After a 3.5 hour drive, by the time I got home and settled it was 11:00pm when I decided that I just couldn't skip the workout. I got upstairs, completed the workout and was still up to do Thursday's workout at 5:30 am.

All in all, things are going fantastic. I've definitely not had an issue with the food plan and if I could just drink the water, maybe sooner than later, you'll be reading about the end of this journey and moving into the maintenance, forever lifestyle change, portion of the program.

I really want to thank all of you who are reading this, all of you who comment on this blog and all of you who comment privately to me about this. My friends and family have been an incredible support network for me during all of this. You all celebrate with me with the rash of phone calls and texts and emails on Monday mornings. You cheer me on and you build my encouragement and determination week by week. You leave your thoughts, love and support on this blog and I certainly couldn't have done it as easily without all of you. I know I tell you all, all the time, but I love you and I have the best ever friends and family! Nobody can say they have a better network of people in their lives than I do.

In closing, I hope you all have a fantastic week.

“Family means too much, Friends are too valuable, and life is too short, to put-off sharing with people, how much they really mean to you and pursuing whatever it is that makes you happy.”

Completion of Week 11!

2009-03-09T20:56:00.002-04:00

I feel like I always start these posts the same way. I can't believe the program is completing its 11th week. It's the 2nd week of March and I still wonder where the year is going so quickly.

This weekend, as everyone has been reading about was my official birthday party. It was an absolutely fabulous time. My friends threw a party on the Starlite Majesty dinner cruise ship out of Clearwater. It was the best birthday I've ever had. There was a little bit of drama along the way with a traffic accident on the Causeway to Clearwater from Tampa. At one point, there were 13 people stuck in the traffic, all trying to get to a boat that was supposed to leave the dock at 7:00 pm. We'd been advised that they don't wait for anyone, so it was stressful trying to get everyone where they were supposed to be on time. The Birthday Girl and her family were late. It was pretty much presumed we were not going to make the ship. They were awesome though and offered to come back to port and get us, but ultimately ended up waiting for our arrival at 7:22 pm. Once on-board, everything was perfect. I had a blast, my friends definitely know how to throw me a party!!!

All that being said, the first thing I wanted when I got on the boat, that thing I had been waiting 11 weeks for...was a glass of wine. Saturday was a crazy, crazy day. It was a busy morning, a little stressful as I ran around trying to make sure everything was perfect for a house full of company, prior to their arrival. I was back and forth to Bed, Bath & Beyond three different times on Saturday, on the phone all day...just a lot going on...I wanted that glass of wine!!! The wine was well worth the wait and I shared a bottle with someone else. Dinner was outstanding, and I was able to eat on plan.

There is definitely more to that story, it might need to be in a post all by itself. However, I really want to get this out and then get everything else I need to do tonight finished.

Speaking of plan...I was a little nervous this morning. I have been having a struggle with drinking the water, and with taking the meds on time (as I look at the water bottle that's not empty yet and it's almost midnight) and eating ENOUGH food during the day. I wasn't sure I'd post a loss this week, was terrified it'd be a gain, with my whole, "No Gain to Goal" attitude, I was freaking out.

I've made a renewed commitment to focus on doing the things that I know work. This morning, however, I was surprised to see a 2.4 pound loss for a total now of 44.2 pounds. I now have 33 pounds to go for the new goal that I set.

This weekend I also had a great analogy for a new feeling of 40 pounds. I have an air mattress with an aluminum frame that I ended up carrying down and back up my stairs and thought I was going to pass out as I did so. It was definitely something to show how much 40 pounds is and what a difference it makes on 13 steps, however many times a day they may be climbed.

In closing, it was a wonderful week, and an even better weekend. It fills my heart with such love and joy to spend quality time with my friends and family. This weekend was the icing on the month-long birthday celebration. I love you all, so very much! Thank you again, for all that you do in my life every day.

Contemplations and Final Decisions

2009-03-04T20:22:00.002-05:00

I know it's quite a surprise for me to blog two nights in a row. Today I had a lot of quiet time, down time to think after bringing Jen to the airport. I have been considering for some time now not stopping at my initial goal, but continuing on another 10 pounds or so. I've mentioned it in a prior blog post and mentioned it again last night in my post.

Well, today I thought more about it. I had a pretty quiet day and thought a lot about a lot of things. I have made the decision to go another 15 pounds past what was my "initial" goal. The initial goal, as you may recall was to lose 62.2 pounds on the program. That would have given me a total loss, from my heaviest weight of roughly 87 pounds. With the new goal set, I'll have a total loss of roughly 102 pounds. This doesn't get me back to my high school graduation weight of 119, but I'm thinking it's about as close as my body might let me get.

When I initially started the program and told the doctor what I wanted to do (62.2), he told me I could go further if I wanted to. I said, we'll see....but, now I think about that ALL the time and WANT it. I think that because things are progressing at such a great pace for me that doing another 15 pounds is something I can forsee.

With all that being said, I'm frustrated beyond belief that I don't have anything I truly LOVE to wear this Saturday to my birthday party. My fabulous friends are throwing my 40th birthday party on Saturday night. Yes, another party, but it's the last one for this year! From what I know about the party it's on Saturday night, I need something that I might wear to church. I know that there are 24 of my closest friends and family attending and that there are 8 people spending the night at my house. More importantly, I know that I have absolutely nothing that I want to wear and as I sit here, literally crying about it, it pisses me off. I had a dress I wanted to wear, it doesn't fit. It was a little too tight, and it still is. I bought something to wear yesterday, today, I hate it. It's more of a work outfit than anything else.

Anyway, back to my thoughts on the additional 15 pounds, I've increased my Wii Fit to 55 minutes a day since Monday of this week, an hour a day starting tomorrow and next week doing an hour and 15 minutes. I'm going to do the hour of step, just a continuation of what I've been doing, and then I'm going to add the actual Wii Fit strength training activites to the program. I do some weight work now to tone some muscles, but definitely need to focus on toning everywhere.

Well, enough rambling for me tonight. I think I'm a little bit overwhelmed by the activites of the last couple of weeks. Maybe I should just give it up for the day and go to bed. Part of me is exhausted and the other part of me is ready to do laundry, vacuum and get ready for the company that is coming this weekend. The thoughts are there, but the energy is not!

In closing...

“What we plant in the soil of contemplation, we shall reap in the harvest of action”

Completion of Week 10!

2009-03-03T22:13:00.003-05:00

The end of 10 weeks....I tried to find some witty way to start this post. I googled 10 weeks to see what you could "do" in 10 weeks. Well, that was a disaster! The first 11 things that come up are all pregnancy related. Since we're not going anywhere near there, we'll just skip the "witty" part, and let you all know how this past week has been.

The past couple of weeks have been a little crazy. Between birthday celebrations, and there's been several, out of town guests and family visits there's been non-stop opportunity to not follow the program. I'm happy to say that through birthday dinners, out of town guests and family time, I've managed to stay on program and realize just how special my friends and family are to me. I love you all, so much! You've made turning 40 a joy!

Yesterday's weigh in was pretty good, with a 2.6 pound loss for a total of 41.8 pounds in 10 weeks. I have 20.3 pounds to go, but am seriously considering continuing on for another 10-15 pounds past my original goal. I'll give it some serious thought once I'm a little closer to the end, but at this point, I'm thinking I'd like to do another 15 pounds.

This past weekend my friend Jen, who lives in Connecticut was here. She came down for us to have a great girls weekend together. We have shopped, until we've almost literally dropped. She met a few of my friends, went to a baseball game, we had some great dinners and just did a lot of catching up. On Saturday, we headed over to the other coast to visit my parents and celebrate my grandmother's 90th birthday. We celebrated with all of her children, five of the six grandchildren (we missed you, Becca) and so many friends from the area. At one point we counted over 50 people at her party. I've never seen her so happy! We headed back to Tampa on Sunday for Jen to fly home on Sunday night, only for her flight to have been cancelled at the last minute due to the snow storm. After a long hold-time with the airline, she was finally rebooked, but the soonest flight out was Wednesday morning. Her weekend trip has now turned in to almost a week long. It's been fun, but unexpected travel issues are never convenient. In October, it will be my turn to go to Connecticut, as Jen's getting married. Hoping there's no travel issues then, since I'll be heading home soon after and she'll be leaving for Europe!!

I'm struggling a little bit with water consumption this last week. I'm not sure there's been a day that I've actually finished the whole gallon of water. I'm guessing that's why this week's loss was "only" 2.6 pounds. Gosh, I hate to say "only" and 2.6 pounds in the same sentence, but when you compare it to the typical loss, it's "only".

As well, I'm still struggling, at times, with the acceptance issue of being happy and proud of what I'm doing. I know that I'm doing the right thing for me, and that I've made the decisions I need to make for it to be a lifestyle change and not just a "diet" but sometimes I still struggle with what other people think about it.

It dawned on me the other day, as I shared a story with a friend, that the last time I was this "stringent" on a diet was back in 2004/2005. I had a surgical procedure scheduled for December of 2004 and when I went for the pre-op physical, the surgeon told me that I couldn't have the procedure done, because my BMI was too high. I needed to lose 12 pounds. I was devastated about having to put off the surgery. I had it scheduled (it was out of town), had flights booked, hotels reserved, the works. I had to change it all, and was unable to reschedule until the 12 pounds was gone. I remember at that point making the decision to lose the 12 pounds as quickly as I could, no matter what. That's exactly what I did. Then I didn't care. I lost the 12, had the surgery and went right back to the old habits a soon as I was home.

I feel this time that it's completely different. I don't feel deprived of anything, I enjoy the food I eat (it's really good stuff!) and I've finally learned that it doesn't matter what I'm eating, or for that matter, it doesn't matter what anyone else is eating. I'm doing what I want to do, for me. There's part of me that can't wait for the final results, but I guess I need to decide what the stopping point is before I can have that!

Well, I've rambled on enough tonight, so in closing, I'll leave you with this quote and a couple of photos:

“Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did.”

My grandmother, mother and I

Jen & I

Completion of Week 9!

2009-02-23T18:32:00.004-05:00

Happy Monday everyone! What a great week and weekend it's been. The whole week was sort of a whirlwind of birthday celebrations, with still, more to come. If this is what turing 40 is all about, sign me up for a repeat every year!

During the last week I managed to have 4 birthday dinners and a birthday lunch! On my actual birthday we went to Longhorn Steak House for dinner. The next day, lunch with the girls from the office. The next night, dinner out, unexpectedly. Friday was my "birthday dinner" from Evie & Jimmie, my friend Chris's parents. They didn't want to wait until my March 7th party to celebrate my birthday, so 7 of us went to the Seminole Hard Rock Casino for dinner and a little gambling. Dinner was fantastic, cooked by Chris & Tina's son-in-law, Gene. It was fabulous! Dinner out again, the next night...it's just been non-stop celebrating! It's been great! The waitress at Floyds, at the casino, had been on the program that I am on before, and knew exactly what I could have. She brought me out my own special dessert, strawberries, blueberries & blackberries, complete with a sparkler. It was awesome!

This week's results really were a surprise. I stood on my scale this morning, and as it ends up, it was weighing me more than the "official" scale. Today's official result was a loss of 3.6 pounds for a total loss of 39.2 pounds. I have 23 pounds to go and I'm so excited about it.

I feel pretty good about the pending transition to the maintenance program. I've been researching the maintenance program. As I've already said here, I have managed to maintain the weight loss of the first 25 pounds I lost, before starting this program, for a year. That has definitely helped encourage me for preparing for the maintenance plan. I didn't go into this lightly. I thought a lot about it, before spending the money, to be sure I knew that I would do whatever it took to get to my goal, as well, whatever it will take to stay at my goal. I'm very satisfied with the fact that this is not a diet that will end, but a lifestyle change that will continue all through the rest of my life.

I guess that it helps me to know that my father did the same thing. We discussed it today. He lost about 35 pounds, over 23 years ago and has kept every bit of it off. He eats healthy, but also never 'forbids' himself from having things. They don't eat a lot of junk food-but really, neither do I. My issue was mostly portion control and definitely a lack of exercise. I know there are people out there that think I'm going to struggle with the maintenance program and think that once the medication stops that it all comes back on. I know there are people who read this who don't agree with the decision that I made to go this direction, but I made the decision that I thought was the best one for me, and so far, it's been incredible. I've discussed the program and maintenance with people who have done the program. I've discussed it with a few friends and family and know what I need to do to maintain. I honestly don't expect it to be a big issue. It's just now part of who I am. I'm the girl who gets up and works out, 6 days a week, no matter what might be happening that day. I'm the girl who plans meals for the day the morning of, or sometimes the night before, because I like to have a plan. It's who I want to be and I'll do what I have to do to maintain it. It's so nice when I go out now for it to not be about the food, but about enjoying the moment and the moments are awesome! I look forward to all of the moments to come, regardless of what might be on my plate!

This week, there are lots of special moments coming up. I'm having out of town company this weekend. My friend Jen, who is my best friend in Connecticut, is coming for the weekend. We've got some lunches and dinners planned,a special dinner for Friday Night Party Night with Jen, Al, Peggy, Tina, Chris & I at the Columbia Restaurant in Ybor City. It's a "must-do" thing when you visit Tampa. Saturday, Jen and I head to my parents house to spend time with them. My family is visiting from Massachusetts and my grandmother is turning 90 on Thursday. We're having a big party for her at her favorite deck bar, yes....deck bar, 90 year old grandmother, she ROCKS! :-) It will be a blast to be with everyone and celebrate her life.

In closing, I hope you all have a great week!

"Fill your life with as many moments and experiences of joy and passion as you humanly can. Start with one experience and build on it.”

Here's a couple of moments of joy from this week:

Completion of Week 8!

2009-02-16T18:16:00.005-05:00

At 9:36 tomorrow morning, I'll no longer be in my thirties. I know you all come here to read a blog about how I did this week, but in my attempt to be "profound" tonight, I did a Google search entitled turning 40, just to see what I could find. Funny enough, 8 weeks ago, I named this blog "The Journey" and tonight I found a website entitled "Turning 40, It's All About The Journey".

I could probably write a blog all about turning 40. I could tell you where I am in my life today, as compared to where I thought I'd be. I could tell you if I was stressing out over turning 40. I could tell you if I'm thrilled. I could tell you whether or not I ever really gave it any thought, but none of those things are the reasons any of you come to read this blog.

What I will tell you, is regardless of where I thought I'd "be" tomorrow, I never dreamed that I'd be on a weight loss journey, still! I don't know that I gave it a ton of thought before, but I am happy to be entering my forties with another 3.4 pounds lost this week for a grand total of 35.6 pounds in 8 weeks. I've lost 7.8% body fat and I'm now bummed for the first time that I didn't do measurements in inches before I started. I do know though, that the size 12 jeans, while still wearable, are a little big these days! That sure didn't last long!

I am still doing a Wii Fit workout, 45 minutes a day, six days a week. I take a break from that on Sundays. This weekend I went to visit my parents across the state. I think that was the first time I realized I was a little obsessed with the Wii Fit workout. I could very well have left on Friday night. I had already brought Cocoa over to visit her "other family". I was here, all night Friday night, working, rather than having Friday Night Party Night. We all kind of split up to do our own things this weekend and FNPN just didn't work out. I could very well have left to go to my parents, who I hadn't seen since Christmas, but I had a Wii Fit workout to do on Saturday morning. Rather than packing it all up and taking it, hooking it up to their television, doing the work out and packing it all back away, I opted to stay home until it was done. There was a day when I'd have opted to skip the workout. Those days are gone. It's the first thing I do when I roll out of bed in the morning. Regardless of the time I actually head to bed, I'm up between 5:30 and 6:00 to do that work out. I guess when the day comes that I have to travel for work, I'll need to make a decision as to what to do workout wise, but for now, it's pretty easy to be home to do it.

I had a great weekend with my parents. They were surprised, to say the least, about the difference from when they saw me last. The weekend after next I'll see family who will be visiting for my grandmother's ninetieth birthday party. I've not seen them in a couple of years. It will be great to hang out with my cousins and have a family celebration. Those of you that know my family, know this is going to be a great time for my fabulous grandmother! She's the most energetic, full of life, almost 90 year old I know. Actually, she might be the only 90 year old I know, but she ROCKS! I'll also have a very good friend here from Connecticut for the weekend. I haven't seen Jen since June of last year, so we're due for some catching up. Of course, all of the parties and all of the company and all of the birthdays mean lots of opportunities to make the right decisions. I look foward to working through all of them and making the choices I know I need to make.

Today, I am debating something as well. I really want to be at under 20 pounds to goal for my party on March 7. It's a little less than 3 weeks away. I am considering the thought (you'll be shocked!) that if for some reason, I'm not at less than 20 pounds to goal, I'm not going to have that beer or glass of wine that I've been waiting for. I honestly don't think I won't be there, but I thought, if I'm going to celebrate, I should really have something to celebrate. With 26.6 pounds left to go today, being under 20 pounds to go is definitely celebratory.

In closing, since I was with my parents this weekend, we did take a couple new pictures. The last time there were pictures posted here was January 12 at 18.8 pounds lost. I'm not reposting those, but here is the latest from this weekend. One word of warning, I love my mother, but she is not a photographer!

This couldn't be more true!!!

"Turning 40 is a big milestone. Some see the Big 4-0 as the entry to middle age, and one step closer to old age. But it is also true that 40 is the new 30. As you celebrate your fortieth birthday, consider that you are old enough to have learned from your mistakes, yet young enough to chart a new direction in your life."

Completion of Week 7!

2009-02-09T20:47:00.002-05:00

Today was the weigh in for the completion of the 7th week of the program. This past week, I wasn't sure, really, how it was going to go. I struggled with drinking water. It was a somewhat stressful week and although I stayed on the program, it's probably the week so far that I felt like I'd done the worst. I forgot medications at times and even doubled up on a dose of evening appetite suppressants one night because I couldn't remember if I had taken them or not! To top it off, my scale didn't move pretty much all week...I'm convinced, it's broken! :)

So, considering all of that, I had no idea what to expect this morning. My scale started to move a little bit this morning and I just kept telling myself that my main goal each week was not a certain number on the scale, but "no gain to goal". This stems from a saying from a weight loss group that I was in back in 1994. Yes, it's been AT LEAST that long since I've been on this roller coaster. Anyway, in that group, I met Chris & Tina who you all either know or have heard so much about. Chris reached his goal during my time in that group with "no gain" any week up to reaching his goal. So, after discussing that at one point during a conversation, I've kept this in the back of my head. No gain to goal is a great thing. If I can go however many weeks without a gain during the entire process, that should be great! I made it through 6 weeks, 29.2 pounds and if this week were to stay the same, then I still did ok!

I know, you're all waiting for the result...well, it was way better than I expected it to be. I lost 3.0 pounds for a total of 32.2 pounds in 48 days. I couldn't be happier today. I've surpassed the 1/2 way mark. I've lost 7.3% body fat. I'm buying smaller clothes and I feel absolutely fantastic.

I saw the Florida marketing team on Wednesday for a meeting, and I'd not seen most of them, other than my team, since October. It was great to see everyone, and so much greater for me to be LESS me when I saw them. This week, I'll see friends I haven't seen since before the holidays as well, this upcoming weekend I'll see my family that I haven't seen since the day after Christmas. I'm very excited for them to see the difference. Although, I say that and my immediate thought is just what last week's blog post was about. I'm just happy that it's going so well!

Since this week was considered another "benchmark" in the program, I am now able to add a few foods to the menu. My Nutritional Plan "Additional Selections" now allow me to have tomatoes, fat-free plain yogurt, plums, sea bass and other stuff I don't care much about. To say that I was beyond thrilled about hitting the benchmark and adding tomatoes and yogurt is a bit of an understatement. It's about all I've talked about for two weeks. I eat a lot of salads, a lot of chicken salads, and I love tomatoes. I'd say it's been 'difficult' to not have tomatoes, but really, it's more annoying than anything else. It's really a mental thing for me to not have something red in my salad. I've spent a fortune in the past 7 weeks on red peppers, just for that reason! Finally, I can have tomatoes! You'd think I'd have had my allowable amount of tomatoes today, as excited as I was, but yet, I didn't! It just didn't work out today! Tomorrow, it's part of the plan though!

This week I'm enjoying the last week of officially being in my 30's. Next Tuesday, I'll be 40 and what I wouldn't give to have a 7.8 pound weight loss when I weigh next Monday. How cool would it be to have a 40 pound loss on my 40th birthday?! Okay, back to reality. I guess the realistic thing to shoot for is having a 40 pound loss when I go to my parents' house to celebrate my grandmother's 90th birthday at the end of the month! The next couple of weeks are going to be kind of crazy with birthday celebrations, dinners, family and friends in town and ends up on the weekend of March 7, with my birthday party. I just hope that I can stay on track and keep focused through all of the festivities. I'm counting down the time until that glass of wine or beer on March 7 as a celebration!

In closing, I hope you all have an awesome week!

“Optimism doesn't wait on facts. It deals with prospects. Pessimism is a waste of time.”

Completion of Week 6

2009-02-02T17:42:00.002-05:00

I know I said it last week, but I can't believe it's been six weeks. Really, I can't believe it's February! What on earth happened to January? Wasn't it just New Year's Eve and I wasn't having champagne? Now it's almost my birthday and then it's going to be baseball season before I know it! Anyway, that's not why you all come here to read this post, so let's get down to business!

Today was fantastic! The result was a loss this week of 4.6 pounds. That brings the total to 29.2 pounds lost and 6.2% body fat also lost in the six weeks. I was amazed. I really didn't expect that big of a loss this week, but I did do what they recommended last week and tried to eat a little more. I really think the big difference was that a couple weeks ago I switched the Calcium Pyruvate from the doctor's office to some I had here, from GNC, and they just didn't seem that effective. I changed back, mid-week last week and it obviously made a difference.

I've been struggling a little bit the last week and 1/2 or so. I'm having a little issue dealing with the fact that it's been a REALLY long time since I've been the weight I am today, I mean, probably since 1993. It's been a really long time since I've had something about ME to be proud of. I'm thrilled with what's happening. I feel great. I'm exercising every day. I'm buying way smaller clothes and it's really not a big hassle for me to stay on the program. The part I struggle with is that sometimes I feel like "proud of my accomplishment" comes off as "arrogant or cocky or self-centered". I've discussed this with a couple people, and they say that it doesn't come off that way at all. I worry about it,though, because it truly isn't meant to be that way. I'm not even sure why I think that. I guess because it's not typically me to brag on something that has anything to do with self-image. I'm just really happy with me right now and I'm proud that for the first time in forever, I'm doing something for me and it's going really well. I know, inside, I'm still the same person. The girl who wants nothing more than to still do things for everyone else and would drop everything and run if her friends or family needed her.

Oh well, I'll get through it, I just need to figure out how. My friends and my family have been amazing through this entire process. I'm so glad to know that I'm almost half way (31.1 will be 1/2 way) to goal and am ready to tackle the rest of it. I did mention this weekend that I did consider another 10 pounds on top of the initial goal...but I'm going to get "there" first and then see where I am.

Someone asked me today if I posted any 'tips' on my blog. Let me just say, that I'm definitely not the advice expert, but I can share what's working for me.

I am drinking a TON of water. As most people who've been reading this know...the program calls for a gallon of water a day. I do finish the gallon most days.

I am exercising on a very regular schedule of 45 minutes a day 6 days a week (even God rested on Sunday!) and I do Wii Fit Step Aerobics for that time. I have switched my workout times to mornings rather than evenings (thanks, C) and it's working out much better.

I don't eat what's not on my list of "okay" foods. I eat a lot of lean and very lean protein, fruits and vegetables. That's all I eat, no carbs at all since December 22, 2008.

Again, I'm definitely not the expert here, but I know what's working for me. I have started to learn to put different meals together with what I can eat and have figured out some variety-just not at lunch. It seems all I ever eat for lunch is a grilled chicken salad. I pick out everything that I can't have (carrots, cheese) and I'm a little bit 'over-zealous' on the stuff I can't have. I inspect each piece of lettuce to make sure there's nothing stuck on it that can't be, I weigh and measure everything and I'm doing pretty good at finding things I can eat out, without too many issues. It's all in the choice that I make.

In closing, this week's quote:
“I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it's only a choice of attitude.”

Completion of Week 5!

2009-01-26T20:58:00.002-05:00

I can't believe it's been 5 weeks. I never would have imagined I'd see the difference in 5 short weeks that I've seen so far. Even though some of this post won't sound that way, I really am truly thrilled with the progress of the program. I actually look forward to Monday mornings to see how the progression has been. I weigh myself at home, and sometimes it's a little more, sometimes it's a little less than the scale at the doctor. Last week and today it was exactly the same.

This morning's weigh-in was good, but, personally, I struggled with it a bit. This week I lost 2.4 pounds for a total of 24.6 in five weeks. I was so disappointed as I had myself set for wanting to see a 25 pound total and it just wasn't there. I beat myself up about it but after discussion with the Medical Assistant, we think that the reason for the slow down (and the fact that I've actually been tired lately) is because I'm not eating enough food. We discussed that I'm still doing 6 days of step aerobics for 45 minutes a day and discussed what I eat in a given day. She really thinks it's because the program already has a very low caloric intake and if I'm not even eating 1/2 of the proteins on the list, then my metabolism will begin to slow down and the weigh loss will begin to slow down as well. I guess she might be right!

I did have a little struggle with the water this week as well. Work has been insanely busy and I just don't get the water in during the day. I come home at night and don't always manage it then either. It seems like if I go out, I tend to drink more water. This week I seem to have eaten out a lot, on the road with work and lots of lunches eaten out. I didn't deviate from the program, drank water when I was out to dinner and lunches, and this weekend we celebrated a birthday with a big family party at Olive Garden and I planned for it and ordered the Salmon with grilled veggies and plain salad. I must have had 4 glasses of water there, just during dinner, but I need to step up what I drink at home as well!

I also broke down this weekend and bought some new clothes. I was to the point where I really needed a few in-between pieces. I got a couple pairs of pants (all hemmed and ready to wear-thanks, Evie!). Work pants were the biggest issue, and a shirt or two. It's amazing what a few articles of clothing that fit can do for you! Now I really see a difference in where I've been losing.

This week I'm focusing on trying to eat more, smaller meals, more frequently and making sure I drink all of the water. The exercise routine will continue, although I've switched it to early mornings so that I can get through with less interruptions, and not have to stress about it if for some reason my day runs longer than I anticipate. It's great to be done with it before 7:00 am!

Thank you all so much for your support. I have been so encouraged by your words, comments, emails and phone calls! You all are awesome!!

“Desire is the key to motivation, but it's determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek.” ~Mario Andretti

Completion of Week 4!

2009-01-19T21:39:00.002-05:00

It's Monday! Today has been a fantastic, yet busy day. I have one month down and 35% of the goal has been attained. I couldn't be happier. Today's official result was a loss of 3.4 pounds for a total loss of 22.2 pounds. It's officially been 27 days.

Today, because I hit a 'benchmark', I saw the doctor when I was in the office. I admitted to him that I struggled this week with the fact that the scale was moving at a much slower pace. The only change I'd made is incorporating the Wii Fit, but on a 6 day per week schedule of 45 minutes of cardio/step aerobics. I was pretty bummed toward the middle and end of the week that it appeared I'd only end up losing about two pounds. I KNOW two pounds is good, but frustrating when you are coming off of a 6 pound loss the prior week, with no changes. I was reminded frequently this week as I expressed my annoyance at "only two pounds" that I was still losing and that two pounds was a nice, healthy, easy to maintain weight loss for one week. I KNOW all of that--I've been on so many different programs throughout the years...it's all stuff that I know, but still!!

I also heard a few analogies over the past few weeks about how much I've lost and relating it to other things. One of my friends said something to the tune of it's like carrying around 12 boxes of butter...well, yes, I suppose it is, but, who does that? I don't carry around boxes of butter, ever...so that didn't really work for me as a great comparison. Someone else told me this week, ya know, it's like carrying around a 16 pound bowling ball, you're not doing that anymore. That kind of worked, but again, I don't typically go around carrying 16 pound bowling balls, unless I might be going bowling. Last night, however, I found an analogy that worked for me. I got home rather late, after being gone from mid-afternoon watching football and needed to feed Cocoa. I went to get her food out and remembered I needed to refill the container. I went to the garage to get the new bag of dog food I had just bought for her. It was an 18 pound bag of dog food. I brought it in the kitchen, picked it up to pour it into it's container...and it hit me....that's an 18 pound bag of dog food! Holy Crap! As of last Monday, I wasn't carrying that around ON ME anymore! Today, it's that bag, plus some! As I was walking upstairs to do my Wii Fit tonight, I thought that about a month ago, everytime I walked upstairs, I was carrying that dog food bag with me, but not anymore! Sometimes you just have to find the analogy that works for you.

There really hasn't been any struggles to report or any issues this week. Work is insanely busy, but that's a great thing in my opinion. I am adjusting well to what I can eat and what I need to do to get my water in and what works for me. I still have not deviated off the plan, and it does get easier and easier to adapt to what's on there. This weekend I had dinner out one night. It wasn't quite what I thought it was going to be, but I ate the part I could, and left the rest. The frustrating part of that was if I had just ordered a salad, with grilled chicken, It would have worked perfectly. So much for trying to do something a little different! I'm determined, I will reach my goal and look forward to every Monday to see how I'm progressing toward the next benchmark.

I think I've blogged before about "treats" and people suggesting that maybe for each 10 pounds I give myself a treat of one meal, whatever I want. I've not done that. I don't have a desire to have a "treat" meal. I am not having any issues and I really don't feel deprived of anything eating healthy, so why bother to "treat" myself at this point. As fast as the pounds are coming off, I'm good with waiting for something special to treat myself. At this point, the treat will be a glass of wine or an ice cold beer at my birthday party.

In closing....Have a fantastically awesome week!

“Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments”

Completion of Week 3!

2009-01-12T23:00:00.006-05:00

Today is officially day 20, but it's Monday, and as we all know by now, it's the weigh in day. This morning I went to my appointment, and the results sort of amazed me. I weighed less today on the doctor's scale than I did on mine, which is a switch! I was a little nervous, because for some reason I seem to think I'm going to have gained 2 pounds in the drive from work to the office-I obsess just a little bit over this!

I got there today, stood on the scale and found out that this week I lost 6.4 pounds for a total of 18.8 pounds so far. The medical assistant was thrilled, kept saying everything was great and I was doing fantastic. I'm sure she says that to everyone, but I feel really good about the progress.

I've still not deviated from the program. It's just not worth it to me. I'm motivated, I'm starting (finally!) to see a difference in my clothes, in my face and just overall the way that I feel. I've actively started a workout program on Wii Fit and do 45 minutes of Basic & Advanced Step 4 times a week. I have noticed that this actually makes me want to go to sleep a little earlier. That's definitely a good thing!

A couple of people had encouraged me to take new pictures of myself every week and post them here to show the progress. Well, I haven't been doing that, I think it's a little too much of me! But this weekend my God-daughter and her family were here and her mom took a few pictures so I could see if there was any progress.

I'm still debating on wheter to post the picture that I have that shows me at probably my heaviest ever weight. It was 3 years ago, next month. Just after starting my job, and when I look at that, I'm really amazed. I've decided not to post that picture quite yet. Someday, I'm sure it will be here!

So, here's the progress from October 2008:

And the start of the program:

And....yesterday, three weeks after the start of the program:

So, at this point, I'm fantastically happy with the progress, and don't anticipate any challenges that I haven't already made it through. I've determined that I can still occasionally eat out and still stay on plan. There's something I can eat everywhere, as long as they have grilled chicken and salad, I'm good to go! I am determined and focused and ready to meet the goal.

In closing, I just want to point out---some people emailed me or messaged me on Facebook and said they were unable to comment on the blog. If you don't have a Blogger ID or a Google account, you can post using the "Anonymous" option and just leave your name (if you wish) in the comment itself.

“Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.”

Work Week Challenge-MET!

2009-01-10T20:12:00.003-05:00

I did it! My last post talked about how I felt as though I might struggle with drinking a gallon of water while being on the road on Thursday. It was almost easier than a regular day!

I brought a bottle (3 liter) of water with me in the car and my 1.5 liter, obnoxiously large, water bottle that I drink out of at home. I finished one full 1.5 liter bottle before even reaching our first agency appointment. Then I drank another throughout the day and of course, water with lunch. I then went out to watch the BCS game and drank what felt like another 1/2 gallon of water during that whole night. What a great game!

So, the water challenge this week definitely wasn't Thursday-but it's almost been a struggle every other day this week! Today I'm trying to fight a cold. You'd think that with all the fluid and vitamins I've been consuming, I wouldn't get sick, but alas, I am!

I really want some comfort food. When I don't feel well there are two things I like and want. I want a grilled cheese sandwich and gatorade. Neither of which I can have. It's a good thing I don't have any bread! I was going to make scallops and snow crabs for dinner, but I want to enjoy it and tonight I don't think I would!

It's been a quiet day, lots of Lifetime Movie Network and lounging on the couch. It was a beautiful day and I missed the whole darn thing! I hate being sick, but I met my challenge and I'm thrilled about that!

“Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try.”

Work Week Challenge-Water!

2009-01-07T20:46:00.002-05:00

As you all know, this program requires a gallon of water every day. This week I've had a bit of a challenge with the water. Monday I didn't even get half of the water down, no reason, nothing else to drink except a cup of tea, but just didn't want water. Tuesday, I did drink it all, but it was almost midnight by the time I was done. Today-much better. Done with water at 7:00 and will be enjoying a great cup of tea shortly as a reward!

Tomorrow is my day I'm really going to struggle. Tomorrow I am on the road for work. I'll be leaving home at 7:00 a.m., so I won't have a whole lot of water to drink before I leave. I'll also be in and out of agency appointments and driving, so it will be a challenge for sure.

All in all this week has gone so far, just a struggle with the water. I've started an exercise program, 40 minutes of step aerobics on Wii Fit every day, and the meds are still making me not tired until super late, but things around home are getting done, since I'm not sleeping much. If only I could find a way to enjoy the water consumption!!

In closing...

I believe that water is the only drink for a wise man. ~Henry David Thoreau

Completion of Week 2!

2009-01-05T22:58:00.003-05:00

Today was the official weigh in for week # 2 on the program. I'm happy to say that in two weeks, I'm 20% to my goal! I weighed today with a 4.2 pound loss from last week for a total of 12.4 pounds in two weeks.

Last week I blogged about upcoming challenges being New Year's Eve and Girls Night. I've blogged about New Year's Eve already. Girls Night was much the same as New Year's Eve. NO issues with wanting what I couldn't have.

Girls Night has been at my house, so I get to plan the menu...of course, this time I just assumed it'd benefit me! I planned a menu of flank steak stuffed with spinach and cheese (mine, minus the cheese) a huge, yummy salad with portabella mushrooms, red peppers, cucumbers and spring lettuce mix, we also had steamed broccoli and mashed potatoes (none for me, thanks!). Dinner was great, but with this awesome group of women, it's definitely not about the food. I'm still sore from all the laughing!

I didn't do the appetziers I usually do, instead I asked the girls to bring appetizers and dessert. They looked amazing. There was a cheeseball (cheese is my weakness) and crackers and fresh sliced tomatoes with fresh mozzarella and french bread. Didn't touch any of it---celery is my new snack of choice! Dessert looked great too, but I stuck to fruit and water. Not even a pomegranate martini!

One difficult thing I realized this week is that I love to cook, mostly for other people. This is not typically a problem, however, I like to cook homemade things and I'm pretty limited as to what I can eat. I still very much enjoy cooking what I can't eat for other people, it's a small way I give back. My very good friends, Chris & Wayne are out of town for 8 days working, so I offered to make them some food to take with them since they are living in a hotel for so many days. I made my homemade chicken parmesan and a baked pasta dish. One thing I used to do is taste as I was cooking, to make sure there was enough of this or enough of that. Well, neither dish is on 'the plan', so I didn't taste as I went. I didn't even lick my fingers! Not that it was difficult to go through that---but my issue is I cooked for them, I care about what I made and have no clue if it is even any good! I told them if it sucked, I was sorry, but I didn't taste it first to make sure it was okay. God, I hope it's good! LOL

At the visit today, I did ask the questions that I had. I asked about the eggs--she said occasionally have a scrambled egg, but that in the hard-boiled ones sometimes people throw away the yolk. I certainly wasn't doing that. She also said that balsamic vinegar is fine to use as well. I'm actually getting used to the taste of red wine vinegar with salads though.

I talked to a friend from high school today who was curious as to what I was doing when I posted a Facebook status showing the total weight loss. She had an appointment to start a similar thing on Wednesday and wanted to know the real scoop. I know you'll do great, A! Call me if you need some more information and DRINK THAT WATER!!

I've started to actually notice a bit of the difference in losing 12 pounds. I can finally see in the mirror a difference, albeit not much, in my sides and in my face a bit. It's just more self-determination to continue on.

My friends and family have been super supportive, much more so than I expected. I thought my father would be upset that I was paying all this money for this, that I was taking medication to do it, etc... but I was willing to take that risk to get to my goal. Well, he certainly wasn't upset. He's thrilled and encouraging...(especially when he heard the words physician monitored!). My mom was here this weekend, and while I had nothing she wanted to eat on Sunday before she left, she was happy as well. I love hearing the encouragement and it helps immensely to get up and do it all over again the next day.

People at work are pretty much aware now and it's not the 'big secret' I thought I was going to make it. Funny how that works! I guess the more people that know, the more encouragement I'm going to get! :) DUH!

In closing, I thought this was a great quote...considering my start time for this program!

People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas. ~Author Unknown

A great start to 2009!

2009-01-01T22:13:00.002-05:00

Happy New Year!

Today is day 9 of the program and it remains something that has been relatively easy to do. This morning, by my scale I was down 13 pounds. I seem to weigh about a pound more at the official weigh in, but I hope that I can attribute that to heavier clothes, the time of day (I weigh in at the doctor at 4:00 in the afternoon) and the fact that, typically by then, I'm pretty much done drinking the gallon of water. Either way, I'm very happy with the progress and the ease at which I can say no to any temptations.

Last night I was at Chris & Tina's New Year's Eve pajama party. We had dinner and the only thing I couldn't have was the potatoes, but the grilled vegetables and pork were fantastic. I also was able to snack on grapes and some of the veggies. There was definitely things that I liked, that I didn't have, but I don't think I had any less fun because I didn't have those things. One of those things was alcohol. At one point, Wayne asked what would happen if I did drink. The program strongly advises that you don't because of the medication side-effect potential. I told him I didn't know, probably nothing, but that it didn't matter, because I wasn't going to "cheat" by having a drink. Instead, I drank water.

At 11:55 I was pouring champagne into glasses for everyone to toast. I had decided I would toast and have a sip of champagne. Midnight struck, we all shouted Happy New Year, hugged and kissed our loved ones and toasted to 2009. I toasted and dumped my champagne into someone else's glass. I didn't do it. Not even a sip!

I've also managed to figure out meals. In the beginning I was having this or that and struggling with breakfast and the like. I've determined I can make an omlette with egg whites, fat free sharp cheddar, deli ham and green peppers and onions and it's pretty dang good! Tonight I made salmon baked with dill, cucumber and onions and steamed broccoli and fresh veggie sticks. It just takes a little imagination, and maybe a "focused" trip to the grocery store!

Yesterday I cleaned out my pantry and freezer of all of the things I can't have on the program. There was probably 6 bags of groceries I brought over to Chris & Tina's house so that it would get eaten instead of going bad and being thrown out. I still have one more party this week to get through, girls night dinner at my house on Saturday, but I've got the menu planned and should be good to go.

I'm anticipating Monday's weigh in and have a few questions about the food plan to get straightened out. I'm allowed 1 hard-boiled egg as a serving, or two egg whites. I get why the difference, but the thing I don't quite understand is why the egg has to be hard-boiled. Why can't I have one scrambled egg? It's just odd that the list is specific to hard-boiled. Also, I want to know can I have balsamic vinegar-it specifically says rice vinegar or red/white wine vinegar. I'm not sure again of the reasons there. Lots of little clarification pieces. It is what it is, but I just want to understand it!

That's all the latest from here. I hope you all had a safe and happy New Year's celebration and are looking forward to a fantastic 2009.

Completion of Week 1

2008-12-29T21:10:00.009-05:00

So, today was the official end of the first week and the weigh in and medication refill. I made it through the week at 100% on the program and it's been relatively easy, with no deviation from the program at all.

Saturday was my most difficult day so far. For some reason I was hungry all day. It was Day 5 and the start of phase 2 of the program, where I am able to add fruits and vegetables and unlimited amounts of "diet gelatin" YUM!

I anticipated Saturday for four days, just to have a salad. I went to Publix, bought everything I wanted for it. I needed fat-free salad dressing and on Saturday afternoon made what I thought looked like a pretty good salad. I got the dressing out of the fridge and reviewed my "rules" only to find out that the dressing was 10 calories over the allowable. I know what you're all thinking, it's only 10 calories...I stood there for a minute and contemplated what to do. I put the salad dressing back in the fridge and used the olive oil and vinegar that was allowable on the plan. YAY!

After the salad, I was hungry all day. I hadn't been hungry any of the other days, and yesterday and today was not hungry either. I didn't finish my water until late on Saturday, so maybe that was it. I don't know.

Anyway, at the official weigh in today, I was down 8.2 pounds from last week. I had to see the doctor today for him to review my bloodwork, which was all normal. The first thing he said to me when he looked at my chart was, "You didn't cheat, I can tell". He was amazed at the progress in a week, especially a holiday week. He encouraged me to add exercise into the routine this week and expect a 2-5 pound loss next week, as long as I stay on plan.

We discussed the medication and the mood I've been in since starting this. I told him I wasn't exactly sure what was in the meds, but I want more! I've just been in a fantastic mood. Nothing much seems to bother me, I'm happy, rested, energetic and just feeling great. I sure hope this part doesn't go away!

He did tell me that it will start to become harder to fight temptation, that I'll start "showing" the loss and people will say things like "you've done so good, one bite won't hurt" but I assured him that my support system is phenomenal and I didn't feel like it was an issue.

I go back next Monday-every Monday from now til the end and will keep you posted along the way.

Potential challenges for this week: New Year's Eve party and Girls Night dinner, but I have the determination to get through both!

Wishing you all a safe and happy New Year!!

By the way-there is a link at the bottom of the blog if you'd like to subscribe and receive the posts in email. It prevents you from coming here to check and see if I've posted anything.

Program Detail and How Things Change

2008-12-27T22:53:00.008-05:00

Since I did the posts yesterday, I realized I didn't put my goal in here anywhere! As of right now, the goal is to lose 62.2 pounds. My initial goal was 52.2 and the date was July 4th, but I'm going to not change my date for now and see what happens when I talk to the doctor on Monday.

Mondays are the official weigh in days. Mondays I also get the medication refills and the injection.

A little about all that: The medications are three different things. One is a pharmacy grade multivitamin with minerals. One is called Calcium Pyruvate and it helps burn body fat, increases endurance and improved physical performace as well as helps maintain lead body tissue and aids in increasing muscle mass. The last one is Phendimetrazine, the appetite suppressant. I'm not so much a medicine person, so the difficult part of this for me is taking 11 pills throughout the day. There are 4 times during the day I am supposed to take the meds. I had to put a reminder in my phone so that I'd remember to take them.

There is also a weekly injection and that includes: MIC, Chromic Chloride and Vitamin B12. The MIC is Methionine which prevents fatigue, works as an antioxidant and has lipotropic actions, Inositil helps with redistributing body fat and promotes healthy hair and skin and the Choline helps to control weight and cholesterol levels, also helps prevent gallstones. The Chromic Chloride regulates carbohydrate metabolism and blood sugar. The B-12 part is the "energy vitamin".

This must be what has me bouncing off the walls sometimes. The one issue I am having is that I'm not sleeping well. Well, that's not entirely true. I'm sleeping well, once I get to sleep. I just haven't been tired at all. The other night I was on Wii Fit at 12:30 because I was awake and nobody was on Facebook to chat with! I've been going to bed about 2 hours later than prior to the program start. I might need to ask the doctor about that on Monday.

I certainly seem to have more energy and really, I've been in a great mood. I'm not sure why, I just feel like I'm a lot cheerier than I maybe was a few weeks ago. I'm just happy and motivated and I know I'm on a mission!

Let's talk about water--do you all know how much water I drank before this all started? Right--NONE! Michelle is not a water lover!! I'd be lucky to drink something other than tea at lunch and a cup of coffee in the morning, if I even had coffee.

Now, I have two problems! I got this awesome coffee maker for Christmas, it's like a "crack-machine"! It's one of those Keurig single cup brewers. Everytime I go in the kitchen I make a cup of coffee or tea. Luckily most of the tea is caffeine free, but I used to drink one cup a day, if that, and now I want coffee all the time.

So, now I want coffee, but I have to drink a gallon of water a day---yes, a GALLON! So I've pretty much resigned myself to a schedule. One cup of coffee when I wake up and run down to the crack machine, then at least 1 liter of water before I can have any more coffee. There are 3.78 liters of water in a gallon. I've been drinking a full 4 liters. The goal is one liter before lunch, one liter at lunch, one in the afternoon and one with dinner/evening. Then I can finish the night off with hot tea. So far it's working well, but drinking that much water has definitely been a change for me. I think I need to buy stock in Zephyrhills Water Company!

Thanks for reading and thank you all for your support!

Never give up. Every step you take is one step closer to success... or a step closer to destruction. You choose...

It's Day 5

2008-12-27T12:55:00.000-05:00

It's day 5 of the journey and since I just started this blog, I'll just say that today starts phase 2 where I am able to add in fruits and vegetables.

The first 4 days of the program are strictly lean and very lean proteins. I made it through the first day (and hadn't told my friends yet) with much success and finally an explanation to my friends as to why I didn't eat dinner during our "family Christmas".

Days 2 & 3 were Christmas Eve and Christmas. I arrived at my parents, shopped for food I could eat (chicken, cottage cheese, hard boiled eggs, etc) and while 7 other people ate Spinach Lasagna, sausage, meatballs, caesar salad and desserts galore, I ate my dinner and drank water. As those that know me know, I am not a dessert person, but my absolute favorite dessert is Carrot Cake. Christmas Eve dessert tradition is Carrot Cake (mom, when did that start?!-LOL) and one of my mom's clients makes an "amazing" carrot cake. Not even a temptation to have a bite. I was way proud of that moment! :) Christmas dinner at my uncle's house was the same way-I just did my thing and it was EASY, well, not EASY but none of it phases me.

So far the program has really been manageable for me. I'm drinking the water, I'm eating only when I'm hungry, I'm taking the meds and I don't feel like I'm losing out on anything. Last night for Friday Night Party Night we went to the movies, the popcorn smelled great, but no desire for any. After the movies we went out to have a drink and a snack. I had "servings" left in my day, so I had cold, steamed shrimp and more water. I had a great time, not having food or drink didn't seem to diminsh the fun I had. Don't get me wrong....I'd love to have a drink, but I am on a mission.

Yesterday I bought a pair of "transition" jeans in a size 10....I can't wait to wear them!!

This morning, I was down 8#, but I'm sure most of that is water at this point. But every day and every pound motivates me even more.

How The Journey Came About

2008-12-27T12:45:00.000-05:00

This past Tuesday, December 23, I started a "Weight Management Program". It's a medically supervised program with medication, weekly injections, and a food plan. I went to the consult on Monday and even the girl who did the consult was trying to discourage me from starting Christmas week.

My thought in this as I made the consult appointment was that I was ready. For those who know me, when I decide I'm doing something....I'm doing it. There's not much changing my mind.

How this all came about: I moved back to Florida almost two years ago. Since that time I've lost quite a bit of weight, and have maintained the weight loss, but wasn't really doing anything to continue losing. I'd thought about doing different things, but I have a friend who was on this program and it worked well for her. We had been discussing that sometimes going out to dinner you end up eating like it's the Last Supper.

I finally have gotten tired of food controlling everything in my life. When I decided that I could afford the program (it's quite expensive) and decided I was going to do it, I did. My point to the girl at the office that tried to discourage me by a couple of weeks, was...well, I still have to eat then too. I could wait until after Christmas, but on January 3 I'll have some friends over for a dinner party and my mom will be in town. So, I could wait til after that. Well, on February 7, my friends are throwing me a birthday party, so maybe I should wait til after that. But, on February 17 it's my birthday....so maybe.....WHATEVER.....there's always a reason.

I thought if I could make it through Christmas week, family dinners, etc...then I could make it through anything....so it begins.

This is the journey through the experience.