Time flies...so they say. It amazes me that 1/4 of the year is almost over. It's the end of March. It's Spring (one of two seasons for us in Florida, not counting Hurricane season) and another season has past.
I can remember being a kid and wondering if time would ever go quick enough to get to the next school vacation or the next trip or the next whatever. These days, I wonder on Thursday, where did this week go?! On Sunday, I wonder where did my weekend go?! Speaking of time, today is day 96 on the program. The completion of 14 weeks of a change in my lifestyle and positive, happy changes in my life. So many things have changed in my life in the past 14 weeks, yet I'm still the same person I was on December 22, 2008.
This week was very successful at weigh-in. Today's weigh-in signified a loss of 4.3 pounds and a total weight loss to date of 55 pounds so far. On my post from December 27th, I posted that the goal was to lose 62.2 pounds. Today, that would mean I'd be 7.2 pounds from my goal. Those of you who have been following this blog, however, know that on March 4th, I added another 15 pounds to the total overall goal. That means, today, I am 22.2 pounds from reaching my ideal goal. I could not be happier than I am right now about the progress that has been made along this journey.
I am still struggling with the fact that I am the same person, yet a different person than I was prior to starting this change. I'm the same girl who I was at a size...yeah, not the size I am today! I still like the same things, do the same things and love my family and friends more than life itself. It's just 'different'. I've never really had a like for myself. I don't necessarily see a thinner me in the mirror when I look. I still see the girl who was hiding from so many things, behind a wall of weight, and a wall it was! Quite honestly, I'm not sure that will ever change. I mean, I see that I buy smaller clothes (and lots of them) and I see that I eat completely different things than I did, and much smaller portions. What I don't see is someone who is a size 8 looking back at me in the mirror. I still, just see me, with the same outlook I had before.
I think I can safely say though, that I am a more positive person today, and I definitely see that. I didn't like the negative, cloudy outlook I had prior to starting all of this. I came home from a vacation in September in a big funk and I hated the person that I was during that time. My friends stood beside me, listened to me whine and cry (lots of crying) and all of the sudden, things changed. I put more faith in God, learned to let go of my past, started to count on my friends more, rather than just being there for them and learned who I truly wanted to be.
I was asked by my best friend this week if I "saw it" (saw what, you ask...keep reading!)...actually I think I was told, I didn't "see it." I don't see how beautiful I am, inside or out. Truth be told, that person was right. I guess I don't see it. I've never been good about seeing the good sides of me. I do what I do for others because it's who I am and it's who I've been for a long time. I used to be pretty selfish, but I no longer want to have a life that revolves around myself. I've changed that. I changed it a long time ago and I'm in a better place for it.
Wow, this blog totally didn't go where I thought it would! I guess we've gone from "time" to "changes". I can certainly say that the feedback I receive on my changes is a positive one. I guess it's time for me to take a dose of my own "positive attitude" medicine and start believing what the special people in my life tell me, every day.
In closing, and I think I say this every week. I am so happy to have the people that I have in my life. My family and friends are such an amazing support network for me. There is nothing in my life today that makes me unhappy and I'm so glad that I can count each of you among the many blessings that I have. I love you all, more than you could ever know.
When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
March 30, 2009
March 23, 2009
Completion of Week 13!
Today marks 13 weeks in the program. Thirteen weeks, 1/4 of a year and 65% of the way to my new goal!!
This weekend, I spent a lot of time cleaning out my master bedroom closet of clothing that no longer fits. I'd done some dresser drawers, and a little bit of the closet a month or so ago, but this time it was full-on "spring-cleaning". Now, let me start by saying, I enjoy shopping. I enjoy shopping for clothes, household stuff, kitchen stuff, anything, really, except for shoes. I despise shoe shopping. Since I enjoy shopping so much, most of my dresser drawers are packed full of things that I haven't worn in, let's just say....a long time. As well, I had no empty hangers in my closet when I started this little project on Saturday morning. I didn't really even know I was starting it. I had company this weekend. They were still asleep; I was trying to be quiet, so I stayed in my room. Boredom overcame me and alas, the closet project began.
By the time I took the first break of clearing out clothes that didn't fit, I'd developed a pile of 46 things hanging in my closet that needed to get out. I was shocked. That was all stuff I knew didn't need to be tried on, mostly shirts that were hanging there for weeks that have been too big. I took a break and went back to it. When all was said and done there were 73 empty hangers in my closet, a HUGE pile of clothes (still) in the bedroom, a laundry basket full and a Rubbermaid container full. A few people have either gone through some or told me they are coming to go through some, but I hope it's soon, because I'm over looking at the piles. It was depressing, but good depressing. There's a ton of money in that pile of clothes, and really, a lot of it needs to be replaced. It's going to cost a fortune for me to replace all this, but it's definitely a good thing. Look out Macy's, Kohl's, Cato...anywhere! It's so cool to be able to shop in sizes 8 and 10. I'm not sure of the last time I was ever able to do that! I probably was too young to shop by myself then!!
Today, as we all know, is Monday. It's the official weigh-in day. I lost 1.5 pounds this week for a total of 50.7 pounds in 13 weeks. Officially over 50 pounds and absolutely thrilled about that! I was a bit bummed by only 1.5 pounds this week, but considering last week was 5 pounds, I guess there's no reason to be disappointed. I'm still keeping my No Gain To Goal attitude and still haven't eaten off of the program.
I find it's easier and easier every day to do this. I don't miss anything that is "forbidden" at this time. I cooked food all weekend for family and friends that came over for dinner. There was a lot of it I didn't eat. The only thing that bothers me about that is the taste of the food I'm serving to other people. I enjoy cooking. I feel fulfilled when I can make a good meal for someone and I truly love being able to share that with the people I love. My biggest fear in that is what if I'm making something and it's not good?!?! I haven't tasted it for the most part, so I'm going at it on 'a wing and a prayer' and hoping it's going to be okay. I used to taste as I went, being able to add things or change things as I was in the process. Granted, nobody's complained, or died, so I guess that's good! Most of the people I cook for read this blog; I'm hoping y'all would tell me if something was really bad. I mean, you keep coming back, so I guess its okay?!?! :)
This upcoming week and weekend appears, at this time, to be relatively calm. It's been a while since there's been a calm, non-eventful weekend at my house. I think I'm so ready for it. I'm hoping the weather is nice, there's a potential boating day on the horizon this weekend. If that doesn't work out, then there's always shopping for new clothes that I can do!
Lastly, I've really been trying to focus lately on having a more positive attitude. When I first moved back to Tampa things were rough. I was angry and bitter about Tom and the divorce, the sale of the house in Jacksonville, just a lot of things.
I think that the past 13 weeks on this program have really given me a different outlook on how my life can be when I focus on the task at hand. I have a better feeling about the direction my life is going. I definitely feel better about myself, and I think that is mostly weight-loss related. I seem to have lost some of the insecurities that I had 13 weeks ago!
I'm happy with my career and the direction that it is going and I'm thrilled to have the best friends anyone could as for. My friends and my family are such an encouragement to me in so many ways. They are all supportive of the decisions I make in my life and have been there to provide their unconditional love when I need it and shoulder to cry on when I need that too. The people I try to surround myself with are positive people. They have a good outlook on life, with the ability to balance their daily lives as well as their hopes, goals and dreams and work hard to achieve them. I strive to have that balance in my life as well and feel like there are things I can do every day to make positive progress in that direction.
In closing....have a positively awesome week!
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined.
Henry David Thoreau
This weekend, I spent a lot of time cleaning out my master bedroom closet of clothing that no longer fits. I'd done some dresser drawers, and a little bit of the closet a month or so ago, but this time it was full-on "spring-cleaning". Now, let me start by saying, I enjoy shopping. I enjoy shopping for clothes, household stuff, kitchen stuff, anything, really, except for shoes. I despise shoe shopping. Since I enjoy shopping so much, most of my dresser drawers are packed full of things that I haven't worn in, let's just say....a long time. As well, I had no empty hangers in my closet when I started this little project on Saturday morning. I didn't really even know I was starting it. I had company this weekend. They were still asleep; I was trying to be quiet, so I stayed in my room. Boredom overcame me and alas, the closet project began.
By the time I took the first break of clearing out clothes that didn't fit, I'd developed a pile of 46 things hanging in my closet that needed to get out. I was shocked. That was all stuff I knew didn't need to be tried on, mostly shirts that were hanging there for weeks that have been too big. I took a break and went back to it. When all was said and done there were 73 empty hangers in my closet, a HUGE pile of clothes (still) in the bedroom, a laundry basket full and a Rubbermaid container full. A few people have either gone through some or told me they are coming to go through some, but I hope it's soon, because I'm over looking at the piles. It was depressing, but good depressing. There's a ton of money in that pile of clothes, and really, a lot of it needs to be replaced. It's going to cost a fortune for me to replace all this, but it's definitely a good thing. Look out Macy's, Kohl's, Cato...anywhere! It's so cool to be able to shop in sizes 8 and 10. I'm not sure of the last time I was ever able to do that! I probably was too young to shop by myself then!!
Today, as we all know, is Monday. It's the official weigh-in day. I lost 1.5 pounds this week for a total of 50.7 pounds in 13 weeks. Officially over 50 pounds and absolutely thrilled about that! I was a bit bummed by only 1.5 pounds this week, but considering last week was 5 pounds, I guess there's no reason to be disappointed. I'm still keeping my No Gain To Goal attitude and still haven't eaten off of the program.
I find it's easier and easier every day to do this. I don't miss anything that is "forbidden" at this time. I cooked food all weekend for family and friends that came over for dinner. There was a lot of it I didn't eat. The only thing that bothers me about that is the taste of the food I'm serving to other people. I enjoy cooking. I feel fulfilled when I can make a good meal for someone and I truly love being able to share that with the people I love. My biggest fear in that is what if I'm making something and it's not good?!?! I haven't tasted it for the most part, so I'm going at it on 'a wing and a prayer' and hoping it's going to be okay. I used to taste as I went, being able to add things or change things as I was in the process. Granted, nobody's complained, or died, so I guess that's good! Most of the people I cook for read this blog; I'm hoping y'all would tell me if something was really bad. I mean, you keep coming back, so I guess its okay?!?! :)
This upcoming week and weekend appears, at this time, to be relatively calm. It's been a while since there's been a calm, non-eventful weekend at my house. I think I'm so ready for it. I'm hoping the weather is nice, there's a potential boating day on the horizon this weekend. If that doesn't work out, then there's always shopping for new clothes that I can do!
Lastly, I've really been trying to focus lately on having a more positive attitude. When I first moved back to Tampa things were rough. I was angry and bitter about Tom and the divorce, the sale of the house in Jacksonville, just a lot of things.
I think that the past 13 weeks on this program have really given me a different outlook on how my life can be when I focus on the task at hand. I have a better feeling about the direction my life is going. I definitely feel better about myself, and I think that is mostly weight-loss related. I seem to have lost some of the insecurities that I had 13 weeks ago!
I'm happy with my career and the direction that it is going and I'm thrilled to have the best friends anyone could as for. My friends and my family are such an encouragement to me in so many ways. They are all supportive of the decisions I make in my life and have been there to provide their unconditional love when I need it and shoulder to cry on when I need that too. The people I try to surround myself with are positive people. They have a good outlook on life, with the ability to balance their daily lives as well as their hopes, goals and dreams and work hard to achieve them. I strive to have that balance in my life as well and feel like there are things I can do every day to make positive progress in that direction.
In closing....have a positively awesome week!
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined.
Henry David Thoreau
March 17, 2009
Completion of Week 12!
Twelve weeks ago today I started this program. I've been posting here every week. Most of you have been reading every week. You've come here to see how the week went, what the outcome was and what the plan is for next week. Most times there's nothing here other than the whole "program journey". Don't worry, this week isn't any different, for the most part. The only thing is, as I looked back at a few posts, there sure have been some things happening that I've managed to push through, remain on the program and not have any issues with. In the past 12 weeks, we've been through Christmas, New Year's Eve, Girls Night, Superbowl, my birthday party-every one of them, my grandmother's birthday party and out of town company.
This week was a little bit different. It was busy, work-wise, but the parties and the company and the excessive opportunity to mess up the program was non-existent. I am still struggling with drinking the gallon of water, I've not completed that every day for a couple weeks. I'm drinking a lot of water, but not anywhere near a gallon. Tomorrow is a new day and I'm going to try to get it done tomorrow.
For the news you've all been waiting for, though...yesterday's weigh in was fantastic. I knew it was going to be okay, but I was not expecting the result of 5 pounds lost for a total of 49.2 pounds. I also lost 2.3% body fat this week. Because I was a day or so away from the 50 pound benchmark, I got to see the doctor as well.
When I went in to see him, the first thing he said, is WOW, you really don't cheat, do you?! I advised him that I didn't, that I can't see spending money like that on something to just do what you want to do. We discussed my meal options and the food I eat and how I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. I eat really, really good food. I certainly don't miss not eating the things I used to eat. That part has been really refreshing. More expensive, but refreshing!
So, it's really going well. As I mentioned last week, I've added an additional 15 pounds to my initial goal, so I've got 28 left to go. At this point, I'm not sure I remember any longer when the last time I was the weight I am now. Sometime between high school and 1992 I suppose, but I no longer can say...."Gosh, the last time I weighed this was ....." Most of my friends today have never seen me at this size or smaller.
I've dropped 5 clothes sizes in 12 weeks. I'm trying not to shop too much (I know some of you don't belive that), but there are things that I have to have. I had no jeans, that's what started the shopping, then I needed work clothes that actually fit. Then I realized all my shorts don't fit. I have another laundry basket of clothes that don't fit, and I've yet to go through all of the shirts in my closet to get rid of the ones that don't fit. I think I've not done that because then I have only a very few things left. Included in the pile of things that don't fit at all are all of the Rays shirts I bought during last baseball season. We have been to two Spring Training games and my 'Rays Gear' is all too big. It's a good problem to have, but I definitely need some different Rays clothes!
The Wii fit workout changes have been going well. I've realized I don't have time for an hour and 15 minutes in the morning. I am doing 45 minutes (with arm weights for 15) one day and 1 hour withouth weights the next and alternating between the two and it seems to be working well. I'm also walking Cocoa at some point during the day. I live on a circle and we walk the circle. Mostly just to get her outside. I have a basket near my front door that houses her leash and she lays in front of that basket and whimpers until she gets to go for a walk. We were going around 11:00 every night, but we've changed that up a bit and now we go after dinner most nights. There are nights when the walk gets skipped, but the workout happens Monday-Saturday, at some point. 99% of the time it's between 5:30 and 6:00 in the morning. Last week, however, I spent the night at my parents house and worked on that side of the state for the day. After a 3.5 hour drive, by the time I got home and settled it was 11:00pm when I decided that I just couldn't skip the workout. I got upstairs, completed the workout and was still up to do Thursday's workout at 5:30 am.
All in all, things are going fantastic. I've definitely not had an issue with the food plan and if I could just drink the water, maybe sooner than later, you'll be reading about the end of this journey and moving into the maintenance, forever lifestyle change, portion of the program.
I really want to thank all of you who are reading this, all of you who comment on this blog and all of you who comment privately to me about this. My friends and family have been an incredible support network for me during all of this. You all celebrate with me with the rash of phone calls and texts and emails on Monday mornings. You cheer me on and you build my encouragement and determination week by week. You leave your thoughts, love and support on this blog and I certainly couldn't have done it as easily without all of you. I know I tell you all, all the time, but I love you and I have the best ever friends and family! Nobody can say they have a better network of people in their lives than I do.
In closing, I hope you all have a fantastic week.
“Family means too much, Friends are too valuable, and life is too short, to put-off sharing with people, how much they really mean to you and pursuing whatever it is that makes you happy.”
This week was a little bit different. It was busy, work-wise, but the parties and the company and the excessive opportunity to mess up the program was non-existent. I am still struggling with drinking the gallon of water, I've not completed that every day for a couple weeks. I'm drinking a lot of water, but not anywhere near a gallon. Tomorrow is a new day and I'm going to try to get it done tomorrow.
For the news you've all been waiting for, though...yesterday's weigh in was fantastic. I knew it was going to be okay, but I was not expecting the result of 5 pounds lost for a total of 49.2 pounds. I also lost 2.3% body fat this week. Because I was a day or so away from the 50 pound benchmark, I got to see the doctor as well.
When I went in to see him, the first thing he said, is WOW, you really don't cheat, do you?! I advised him that I didn't, that I can't see spending money like that on something to just do what you want to do. We discussed my meal options and the food I eat and how I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. I eat really, really good food. I certainly don't miss not eating the things I used to eat. That part has been really refreshing. More expensive, but refreshing!
So, it's really going well. As I mentioned last week, I've added an additional 15 pounds to my initial goal, so I've got 28 left to go. At this point, I'm not sure I remember any longer when the last time I was the weight I am now. Sometime between high school and 1992 I suppose, but I no longer can say...."Gosh, the last time I weighed this was ....." Most of my friends today have never seen me at this size or smaller.
I've dropped 5 clothes sizes in 12 weeks. I'm trying not to shop too much (I know some of you don't belive that), but there are things that I have to have. I had no jeans, that's what started the shopping, then I needed work clothes that actually fit. Then I realized all my shorts don't fit. I have another laundry basket of clothes that don't fit, and I've yet to go through all of the shirts in my closet to get rid of the ones that don't fit. I think I've not done that because then I have only a very few things left. Included in the pile of things that don't fit at all are all of the Rays shirts I bought during last baseball season. We have been to two Spring Training games and my 'Rays Gear' is all too big. It's a good problem to have, but I definitely need some different Rays clothes!
The Wii fit workout changes have been going well. I've realized I don't have time for an hour and 15 minutes in the morning. I am doing 45 minutes (with arm weights for 15) one day and 1 hour withouth weights the next and alternating between the two and it seems to be working well. I'm also walking Cocoa at some point during the day. I live on a circle and we walk the circle. Mostly just to get her outside. I have a basket near my front door that houses her leash and she lays in front of that basket and whimpers until she gets to go for a walk. We were going around 11:00 every night, but we've changed that up a bit and now we go after dinner most nights. There are nights when the walk gets skipped, but the workout happens Monday-Saturday, at some point. 99% of the time it's between 5:30 and 6:00 in the morning. Last week, however, I spent the night at my parents house and worked on that side of the state for the day. After a 3.5 hour drive, by the time I got home and settled it was 11:00pm when I decided that I just couldn't skip the workout. I got upstairs, completed the workout and was still up to do Thursday's workout at 5:30 am.
All in all, things are going fantastic. I've definitely not had an issue with the food plan and if I could just drink the water, maybe sooner than later, you'll be reading about the end of this journey and moving into the maintenance, forever lifestyle change, portion of the program.
I really want to thank all of you who are reading this, all of you who comment on this blog and all of you who comment privately to me about this. My friends and family have been an incredible support network for me during all of this. You all celebrate with me with the rash of phone calls and texts and emails on Monday mornings. You cheer me on and you build my encouragement and determination week by week. You leave your thoughts, love and support on this blog and I certainly couldn't have done it as easily without all of you. I know I tell you all, all the time, but I love you and I have the best ever friends and family! Nobody can say they have a better network of people in their lives than I do.
In closing, I hope you all have a fantastic week.
“Family means too much, Friends are too valuable, and life is too short, to put-off sharing with people, how much they really mean to you and pursuing whatever it is that makes you happy.”
March 9, 2009
Completion of Week 11!
I feel like I always start these posts the same way. I can't believe the program is completing its 11th week. It's the 2nd week of March and I still wonder where the year is going so quickly.
This weekend, as everyone has been reading about was my official birthday party. It was an absolutely fabulous time. My friends threw a party on the Starlite Majesty dinner cruise ship out of Clearwater. It was the best birthday I've ever had. There was a little bit of drama along the way with a traffic accident on the Causeway to Clearwater from Tampa. At one point, there were 13 people stuck in the traffic, all trying to get to a boat that was supposed to leave the dock at 7:00 pm. We'd been advised that they don't wait for anyone, so it was stressful trying to get everyone where they were supposed to be on time. The Birthday Girl and her family were late. It was pretty much presumed we were not going to make the ship. They were awesome though and offered to come back to port and get us, but ultimately ended up waiting for our arrival at 7:22 pm. Once on-board, everything was perfect. I had a blast, my friends definitely know how to throw me a party!!!
All that being said, the first thing I wanted when I got on the boat, that thing I had been waiting 11 weeks for...was a glass of wine. Saturday was a crazy, crazy day. It was a busy morning, a little stressful as I ran around trying to make sure everything was perfect for a house full of company, prior to their arrival. I was back and forth to Bed, Bath & Beyond three different times on Saturday, on the phone all day...just a lot going on...I wanted that glass of wine!!! The wine was well worth the wait and I shared a bottle with someone else. Dinner was outstanding, and I was able to eat on plan.
There is definitely more to that story, it might need to be in a post all by itself. However, I really want to get this out and then get everything else I need to do tonight finished.
Speaking of plan...I was a little nervous this morning. I have been having a struggle with drinking the water, and with taking the meds on time (as I look at the water bottle that's not empty yet and it's almost midnight) and eating ENOUGH food during the day. I wasn't sure I'd post a loss this week, was terrified it'd be a gain, with my whole, "No Gain to Goal" attitude, I was freaking out.
I've made a renewed commitment to focus on doing the things that I know work. This morning, however, I was surprised to see a 2.4 pound loss for a total now of 44.2 pounds. I now have 33 pounds to go for the new goal that I set.
This weekend I also had a great analogy for a new feeling of 40 pounds. I have an air mattress with an aluminum frame that I ended up carrying down and back up my stairs and thought I was going to pass out as I did so. It was definitely something to show how much 40 pounds is and what a difference it makes on 13 steps, however many times a day they may be climbed.
In closing, it was a wonderful week, and an even better weekend. It fills my heart with such love and joy to spend quality time with my friends and family. This weekend was the icing on the month-long birthday celebration. I love you all, so very much! Thank you again, for all that you do in my life every day.
This weekend, as everyone has been reading about was my official birthday party. It was an absolutely fabulous time. My friends threw a party on the Starlite Majesty dinner cruise ship out of Clearwater. It was the best birthday I've ever had. There was a little bit of drama along the way with a traffic accident on the Causeway to Clearwater from Tampa. At one point, there were 13 people stuck in the traffic, all trying to get to a boat that was supposed to leave the dock at 7:00 pm. We'd been advised that they don't wait for anyone, so it was stressful trying to get everyone where they were supposed to be on time. The Birthday Girl and her family were late. It was pretty much presumed we were not going to make the ship. They were awesome though and offered to come back to port and get us, but ultimately ended up waiting for our arrival at 7:22 pm. Once on-board, everything was perfect. I had a blast, my friends definitely know how to throw me a party!!!
All that being said, the first thing I wanted when I got on the boat, that thing I had been waiting 11 weeks for...was a glass of wine. Saturday was a crazy, crazy day. It was a busy morning, a little stressful as I ran around trying to make sure everything was perfect for a house full of company, prior to their arrival. I was back and forth to Bed, Bath & Beyond three different times on Saturday, on the phone all day...just a lot going on...I wanted that glass of wine!!! The wine was well worth the wait and I shared a bottle with someone else. Dinner was outstanding, and I was able to eat on plan.
There is definitely more to that story, it might need to be in a post all by itself. However, I really want to get this out and then get everything else I need to do tonight finished.
Speaking of plan...I was a little nervous this morning. I have been having a struggle with drinking the water, and with taking the meds on time (as I look at the water bottle that's not empty yet and it's almost midnight) and eating ENOUGH food during the day. I wasn't sure I'd post a loss this week, was terrified it'd be a gain, with my whole, "No Gain to Goal" attitude, I was freaking out.
I've made a renewed commitment to focus on doing the things that I know work. This morning, however, I was surprised to see a 2.4 pound loss for a total now of 44.2 pounds. I now have 33 pounds to go for the new goal that I set.
This weekend I also had a great analogy for a new feeling of 40 pounds. I have an air mattress with an aluminum frame that I ended up carrying down and back up my stairs and thought I was going to pass out as I did so. It was definitely something to show how much 40 pounds is and what a difference it makes on 13 steps, however many times a day they may be climbed.
In closing, it was a wonderful week, and an even better weekend. It fills my heart with such love and joy to spend quality time with my friends and family. This weekend was the icing on the month-long birthday celebration. I love you all, so very much! Thank you again, for all that you do in my life every day.
March 4, 2009
Contemplations and Final Decisions
I know it's quite a surprise for me to blog two nights in a row. Today I had a lot of quiet time, down time to think after bringing Jen to the airport. I have been considering for some time now not stopping at my initial goal, but continuing on another 10 pounds or so. I've mentioned it in a prior blog post and mentioned it again last night in my post.
Well, today I thought more about it. I had a pretty quiet day and thought a lot about a lot of things. I have made the decision to go another 15 pounds past what was my "initial" goal. The initial goal, as you may recall was to lose 62.2 pounds on the program. That would have given me a total loss, from my heaviest weight of roughly 87 pounds. With the new goal set, I'll have a total loss of roughly 102 pounds. This doesn't get me back to my high school graduation weight of 119, but I'm thinking it's about as close as my body might let me get.
When I initially started the program and told the doctor what I wanted to do (62.2), he told me I could go further if I wanted to. I said, we'll see....but, now I think about that ALL the time and WANT it. I think that because things are progressing at such a great pace for me that doing another 15 pounds is something I can forsee.
With all that being said, I'm frustrated beyond belief that I don't have anything I truly LOVE to wear this Saturday to my birthday party. My fabulous friends are throwing my 40th birthday party on Saturday night. Yes, another party, but it's the last one for this year! From what I know about the party it's on Saturday night, I need something that I might wear to church. I know that there are 24 of my closest friends and family attending and that there are 8 people spending the night at my house. More importantly, I know that I have absolutely nothing that I want to wear and as I sit here, literally crying about it, it pisses me off. I had a dress I wanted to wear, it doesn't fit. It was a little too tight, and it still is. I bought something to wear yesterday, today, I hate it. It's more of a work outfit than anything else.
Anyway, back to my thoughts on the additional 15 pounds, I've increased my Wii Fit to 55 minutes a day since Monday of this week, an hour a day starting tomorrow and next week doing an hour and 15 minutes. I'm going to do the hour of step, just a continuation of what I've been doing, and then I'm going to add the actual Wii Fit strength training activites to the program. I do some weight work now to tone some muscles, but definitely need to focus on toning everywhere.
Well, enough rambling for me tonight. I think I'm a little bit overwhelmed by the activites of the last couple of weeks. Maybe I should just give it up for the day and go to bed. Part of me is exhausted and the other part of me is ready to do laundry, vacuum and get ready for the company that is coming this weekend. The thoughts are there, but the energy is not!
In closing...
“What we plant in the soil of contemplation, we shall reap in the harvest of action”
Well, today I thought more about it. I had a pretty quiet day and thought a lot about a lot of things. I have made the decision to go another 15 pounds past what was my "initial" goal. The initial goal, as you may recall was to lose 62.2 pounds on the program. That would have given me a total loss, from my heaviest weight of roughly 87 pounds. With the new goal set, I'll have a total loss of roughly 102 pounds. This doesn't get me back to my high school graduation weight of 119, but I'm thinking it's about as close as my body might let me get.
When I initially started the program and told the doctor what I wanted to do (62.2), he told me I could go further if I wanted to. I said, we'll see....but, now I think about that ALL the time and WANT it. I think that because things are progressing at such a great pace for me that doing another 15 pounds is something I can forsee.
With all that being said, I'm frustrated beyond belief that I don't have anything I truly LOVE to wear this Saturday to my birthday party. My fabulous friends are throwing my 40th birthday party on Saturday night. Yes, another party, but it's the last one for this year! From what I know about the party it's on Saturday night, I need something that I might wear to church. I know that there are 24 of my closest friends and family attending and that there are 8 people spending the night at my house. More importantly, I know that I have absolutely nothing that I want to wear and as I sit here, literally crying about it, it pisses me off. I had a dress I wanted to wear, it doesn't fit. It was a little too tight, and it still is. I bought something to wear yesterday, today, I hate it. It's more of a work outfit than anything else.
Anyway, back to my thoughts on the additional 15 pounds, I've increased my Wii Fit to 55 minutes a day since Monday of this week, an hour a day starting tomorrow and next week doing an hour and 15 minutes. I'm going to do the hour of step, just a continuation of what I've been doing, and then I'm going to add the actual Wii Fit strength training activites to the program. I do some weight work now to tone some muscles, but definitely need to focus on toning everywhere.
Well, enough rambling for me tonight. I think I'm a little bit overwhelmed by the activites of the last couple of weeks. Maybe I should just give it up for the day and go to bed. Part of me is exhausted and the other part of me is ready to do laundry, vacuum and get ready for the company that is coming this weekend. The thoughts are there, but the energy is not!
In closing...
“What we plant in the soil of contemplation, we shall reap in the harvest of action”
March 3, 2009
Completion of Week 10!
The end of 10 weeks....I tried to find some witty way to start this post. I googled 10 weeks to see what you could "do" in 10 weeks. Well, that was a disaster! The first 11 things that come up are all pregnancy related. Since we're not going anywhere near there, we'll just skip the "witty" part, and let you all know how this past week has been.
The past couple of weeks have been a little crazy. Between birthday celebrations, and there's been several, out of town guests and family visits there's been non-stop opportunity to not follow the program. I'm happy to say that through birthday dinners, out of town guests and family time, I've managed to stay on program and realize just how special my friends and family are to me. I love you all, so much! You've made turning 40 a joy!
Yesterday's weigh in was pretty good, with a 2.6 pound loss for a total of 41.8 pounds in 10 weeks. I have 20.3 pounds to go, but am seriously considering continuing on for another 10-15 pounds past my original goal. I'll give it some serious thought once I'm a little closer to the end, but at this point, I'm thinking I'd like to do another 15 pounds.
This past weekend my friend Jen, who lives in Connecticut was here. She came down for us to have a great girls weekend together. We have shopped, until we've almost literally dropped. She met a few of my friends, went to a baseball game, we had some great dinners and just did a lot of catching up. On Saturday, we headed over to the other coast to visit my parents and celebrate my grandmother's 90th birthday. We celebrated with all of her children, five of the six grandchildren (we missed you, Becca) and so many friends from the area. At one point we counted over 50 people at her party. I've never seen her so happy! We headed back to Tampa on Sunday for Jen to fly home on Sunday night, only for her flight to have been cancelled at the last minute due to the snow storm. After a long hold-time with the airline, she was finally rebooked, but the soonest flight out was Wednesday morning. Her weekend trip has now turned in to almost a week long. It's been fun, but unexpected travel issues are never convenient. In October, it will be my turn to go to Connecticut, as Jen's getting married. Hoping there's no travel issues then, since I'll be heading home soon after and she'll be leaving for Europe!!
I'm struggling a little bit with water consumption this last week. I'm not sure there's been a day that I've actually finished the whole gallon of water. I'm guessing that's why this week's loss was "only" 2.6 pounds. Gosh, I hate to say "only" and 2.6 pounds in the same sentence, but when you compare it to the typical loss, it's "only".
As well, I'm still struggling, at times, with the acceptance issue of being happy and proud of what I'm doing. I know that I'm doing the right thing for me, and that I've made the decisions I need to make for it to be a lifestyle change and not just a "diet" but sometimes I still struggle with what other people think about it.
It dawned on me the other day, as I shared a story with a friend, that the last time I was this "stringent" on a diet was back in 2004/2005. I had a surgical procedure scheduled for December of 2004 and when I went for the pre-op physical, the surgeon told me that I couldn't have the procedure done, because my BMI was too high. I needed to lose 12 pounds. I was devastated about having to put off the surgery. I had it scheduled (it was out of town), had flights booked, hotels reserved, the works. I had to change it all, and was unable to reschedule until the 12 pounds was gone. I remember at that point making the decision to lose the 12 pounds as quickly as I could, no matter what. That's exactly what I did. Then I didn't care. I lost the 12, had the surgery and went right back to the old habits a soon as I was home.
I feel this time that it's completely different. I don't feel deprived of anything, I enjoy the food I eat (it's really good stuff!) and I've finally learned that it doesn't matter what I'm eating, or for that matter, it doesn't matter what anyone else is eating. I'm doing what I want to do, for me. There's part of me that can't wait for the final results, but I guess I need to decide what the stopping point is before I can have that!
Well, I've rambled on enough tonight, so in closing, I'll leave you with this quote and a couple of photos:
“Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did.”
My grandmother, mother and I
Jen & I
The past couple of weeks have been a little crazy. Between birthday celebrations, and there's been several, out of town guests and family visits there's been non-stop opportunity to not follow the program. I'm happy to say that through birthday dinners, out of town guests and family time, I've managed to stay on program and realize just how special my friends and family are to me. I love you all, so much! You've made turning 40 a joy!
Yesterday's weigh in was pretty good, with a 2.6 pound loss for a total of 41.8 pounds in 10 weeks. I have 20.3 pounds to go, but am seriously considering continuing on for another 10-15 pounds past my original goal. I'll give it some serious thought once I'm a little closer to the end, but at this point, I'm thinking I'd like to do another 15 pounds.
This past weekend my friend Jen, who lives in Connecticut was here. She came down for us to have a great girls weekend together. We have shopped, until we've almost literally dropped. She met a few of my friends, went to a baseball game, we had some great dinners and just did a lot of catching up. On Saturday, we headed over to the other coast to visit my parents and celebrate my grandmother's 90th birthday. We celebrated with all of her children, five of the six grandchildren (we missed you, Becca) and so many friends from the area. At one point we counted over 50 people at her party. I've never seen her so happy! We headed back to Tampa on Sunday for Jen to fly home on Sunday night, only for her flight to have been cancelled at the last minute due to the snow storm. After a long hold-time with the airline, she was finally rebooked, but the soonest flight out was Wednesday morning. Her weekend trip has now turned in to almost a week long. It's been fun, but unexpected travel issues are never convenient. In October, it will be my turn to go to Connecticut, as Jen's getting married. Hoping there's no travel issues then, since I'll be heading home soon after and she'll be leaving for Europe!!
I'm struggling a little bit with water consumption this last week. I'm not sure there's been a day that I've actually finished the whole gallon of water. I'm guessing that's why this week's loss was "only" 2.6 pounds. Gosh, I hate to say "only" and 2.6 pounds in the same sentence, but when you compare it to the typical loss, it's "only".
As well, I'm still struggling, at times, with the acceptance issue of being happy and proud of what I'm doing. I know that I'm doing the right thing for me, and that I've made the decisions I need to make for it to be a lifestyle change and not just a "diet" but sometimes I still struggle with what other people think about it.
It dawned on me the other day, as I shared a story with a friend, that the last time I was this "stringent" on a diet was back in 2004/2005. I had a surgical procedure scheduled for December of 2004 and when I went for the pre-op physical, the surgeon told me that I couldn't have the procedure done, because my BMI was too high. I needed to lose 12 pounds. I was devastated about having to put off the surgery. I had it scheduled (it was out of town), had flights booked, hotels reserved, the works. I had to change it all, and was unable to reschedule until the 12 pounds was gone. I remember at that point making the decision to lose the 12 pounds as quickly as I could, no matter what. That's exactly what I did. Then I didn't care. I lost the 12, had the surgery and went right back to the old habits a soon as I was home.
I feel this time that it's completely different. I don't feel deprived of anything, I enjoy the food I eat (it's really good stuff!) and I've finally learned that it doesn't matter what I'm eating, or for that matter, it doesn't matter what anyone else is eating. I'm doing what I want to do, for me. There's part of me that can't wait for the final results, but I guess I need to decide what the stopping point is before I can have that!
Well, I've rambled on enough tonight, so in closing, I'll leave you with this quote and a couple of photos:
“Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did.”
My grandmother, mother and I
Jen & I
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)